Drunk Seagulls Are Turning Up In Southwest England And People Are Shook.

New York Post – Dozens of drunk seagulls have been found on beaches in Southwest England after scavenging alcohol, according to news reports.

Citing the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, Sky News reports that some seagulls have died and others are “seriously ill.”

“The birds appear disoriented and confused and struggle to stand,” explained RSPCA vet David Couper. “We took some video of one of the birds who is staggering around and losing his balance just like a person would if they’d had too much to drink.”

DevonLive reports that one seagull “reeking of beer” vomited over firefighters sent to rescue it after it had fallen off a roof in Lyme Regis.

Huge story out of Devon County in Southwest England! I always knew seagulls had a little edge about ‘em. A little buzz that says “yeah we’re basically pests that hover around heavily populated coastal cities and scavenge your scraps, but we’re also here to fucking party”. There’s just something about the way they squawk and fly around in their bird cliques, going to town on chips and people’s half eaten hot dogs and other delicacies they find amongst the sandy beach towns they inhabit. This story just confirms it. Seagulls fuck.

People are getting all butthurt because the seagulls looked visibly drunk and one of them even threw up on a firefighter which I have a ton of respect for, but I really don’t think it’s that big of a deal. It’s fucking summertime and we need to just let these guys live their lives. We don’t run around telling all the drunk asshole humans of the world that they need to get it together. Well, actually we do but the point is we’re talking about birds here. They’re not hurting anyone but themselves.

If they want to crank down the last few gulps of a warm Bud heavy every now and again, it’s not our role as a species to stop them. Let the seagulls drink the devil’s water all they want, eventually they’ll learn about moderation the same we all had to when we were kids. It’s the way of the world. We weren’t put on earth to fight it. The drunk seagulls of Southwest England deserve to party on. It’s time we just accept it.