"Irish sunglasses"?

Applebee’s done it again…

They are shilling $2 Sam Adams Octoberfest beers throughout the month of September.

This  follows up their recent “Dollarita”- $1 Margarita special, and their infamous “Kickoff To Summer” promotion offering $1 Long Island Ice Teas throughout the month of June.

Apparently, Applebee’s doesn’t have the concerns of running this event in September, even though the beer they are promoting actually has the word “October” in its name*… The majority of stool occupiers (stoolies?) at Applebee’s aren’t poring over the menu with a red pen for inconsistencies like this.  If they did, they would probably notice that “Classic Chicken Parmesan” isn’t traditionally made in a microwave or served with a steamed breadstick.

(the resolution quality on this pic is poor, but so is the food)

I shat on Applebee’s in a blog last month for the whole “Dollarita” thing, but I think this September-fest is a step in the right direction.  Can you imagine how many DUI’s, unwanted pregnancies, and Irish sunglasses came as a direct result from the great unwashed being able to get absolutely shitfaced at the local Applebee’s for less money than they would spend… Well… For less money than they would spend getting absolutely shitfaced at the local Applebee’s on any other month of the year?

Doubling the price to two bucks from a buck, and lowering the alcohol amount from Long Islands and Margaritas to just beer should be a somewhat successful governor and a fucking GODSEND to local police and/or any kid who doesn’t like watching their dad throw up in the hedges outside of their bedroom window.

And, as always, Applebee’s made sure they included “Drink Responsibly/Drive Responsibly” in the corner of their print ads, because nothing says responsible driving like 10 beers for $20.

I cant drive a fucking nail after 10 beers, much less a 7 Series BMW (I don’t drive one, but Applebee’s parking lot is littered with them).  I think it would be less hypocritical and more economical if Applebee’s would abandon all mention of “responsibility” going forward, and just cross-promote these events with Uber.

Final thought- Maybe Applebee’s should realize September is easy pickings’ for one demographic in particular… Save the Octoberfest beer for October and use September to start offering “$1 White Wine Wednesdays” for all the moms who dropped their kids off back-to-school… Maybe cross promote with Rite-Aid and give them 25% on AA batteries.

Those ladies are ready to play.

Drinking good in the neighborhood.

Take a report.

-Large

* I am aware the real kraut Oktoberfest starts end of September… I don’t care.