Some Mic'd Up Texans Defenders Getting Frustrated by Tom Brady is Sweet Patriots Porn

Not all Patriots Porn has to be a long, epic masterpiece with high production values. Sometimes you just want to skip the intricate plot about the frustrated housewife who wants to explore all the aspects of her sexuality and then ding dong! the pizza delivery guy is at the door. Sometime you just want to get right to the money shot. And that’s what this is.

Phillip “12 Receptions in 2017″ Dorsett emerging as a dependable weapon. Tom Brady with a pre-Deflategate ear-to-ear grin screaming “Way to go, babeee! Fuck yeah!!!” like it’s 2004 all over again. To the utter dismay of Angelo Blackson, Brandon Dunn and DJ Reader, frustrated because they can’t process how a guy who was at Michigan back when they were still filling diapers could be getting the ball out so fast. Pats Porn-wise, there are times when that is all you need.

But just while you’re in your refractory period, enjoy this in-depth breakdown of that very touchdown:

And this short clip showing how huge a factor Trent Brown was in shutting down the Texans pass rush, specifically Jadeveon Clowney and Whitney Mercilus:

And these are just three videos from one game. If the Patriots Porn keeps coming out at this pace all season long, you’re gonna need a bigger sock.