Guy Proposes To His Girlfriend During A Break In The Action From A Zombie VR Game

I don’t mind the idea or the execution. It’s original and I’m sure these two love VR and zombies so it’s probably the right tone for them. I wish them a lifetime of virtual happiness. May they bang the ears off their computer-modified selves from here till kingdom come.

Here’s the problem: this guy has set the bar too high. He established a baseline reality for their relationship that cannot be topped. His fiancée will now expect a lifetime of world-building and dreamscape surprises, much like Marion Cotillard’s character in Inception. And just like Mal, once the goggles come off, she’ll struggle to readjust to the real world.

You think it’s fun to say yes to this tall drink of water:

Only to take the goggles off and realize you’ve committed your life to this human Shrek?

That’s like when you take a guy home from the bar on Saturday night, thinking he’s a gallant, 6’4” sommelier with a love of gardening. But Sunday morning, with your brain thundering against your skull, you roll over and see that even lying down, he’s not touching 5’9”, and he’s only a sommelier insofar as he drinks wine until his teeth are mauve, and he’s required to garden because he’s a landscaper.

When you propose, you need to provide a realistic preview of what you can offer. It’s a sales pitch. Bring a powerpoint if you must, replete with financial statements, blood tests, and a plan for freezing your sperm. Start small, stay humble, and do your best to hold on as long as you can.

Sadly, I fear this young lady won’t be able to handle the crushing disappointment of reality. She’ll find escape in virtual environments, but the come-down will be too hard. You can’t spend your entire life living in a computer. Without grounding, she’ll jump from the ledge of, uhm, their 1-story trailer home. And she’ll roll an ankle or something and be totally fine. But it’s indicative of a suicide attempt. And that’s not happiness at all.

PS- Inception is my #1 favorite movie of all time. Unequivocally. Leo’s acting in this scene is nuts.