It Looks Like Joakim Noah Is Growing Impatient For His Release From The Knicks

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Nothing quite says Friday afternoon like an employee dreaming about kicking his shoes off, enjoying a nice payday, and not having to worry about work for a while. Granted most of the people that live this fantasy on a weekly basis are cube monkeys grinding out the 9-5 and counting down the milliseconds until happy hour instead of a guy that skimasked $72 million from a basketball team after playing a grand total of 53 basketball games. So while Joakim’s now deleted Instagram story is slightly relatable, it’s really not all that relatable. Especially with all those exclamation points. Who uses that many exclamation points (other than the infamous fake email from Portnoy from one of the blue checkmarks Barstool has battled in the last year that everybody has already forgotten about).

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I know we have heard rumors about the Knicks wiping Phil’s Folly off the books with the stretch provision for a while now and him appearing on the official roster is comical at this point. But I don’t see any reason the Knicks should stretch him a minute before they are ready. The more money Noah is willing to give back, the more the Knicks will have to use on free agents that will definitely sign here and not leave millions of Knicks fans with blue balls next summer. If Noah wants out bad enough, the Knicks should hold him hostage as much as you can hold someone that just robbed tens of millions of dollars from you hostages. Shit, if I was the Knicks GM, I’d make Noah travel with the team until he came to the Knicks with a number that the franchise was happy with. You think Joakim Noah would rather be in Washington D.C. next week or in Ibiza with some supersmoke spending James Dolan’s hard-earned money? Because I’m sure posting pics of commuting while looking like a subway creature is going to get old pretty fast.

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Also, I’m not saying that ESPN needs to do a 30 For 30 about the 2016 Free Agent Bonanza but somebody needs to do some sort of documentary about the piles of money that were doused in gasoline and lit on fire by NBA GMs around the country 2 summers ago.