Happy Halloween From Conor McGregor And Hugo The Firedog!

“Happy Halloween everyone! Here is a quick message from Hugo The Firedog asking you all to be safe out there while enjoying the festivities! Shoutout to our Firemen and Women and our first responders all around the globe working extra hard today to keep us safe! Thank you and Happy Halloween!”

Conor McGregor just posted this photo of someone we haven’t seen in a looooooong time to his Instagram, and he practically made my Halloween in the process!

IT’S HIS FAMILY DOG HUGO!!! And you know what?!?! Today, for Halloween, he’s Hugo the Firedog. A-fucking-DORABLE!!! And he would like you to be safe out there while enjoying the festivities, so please abide by the laws that Hugo the Firedog has put in place tonight.

Also, I went to a costume party last night, my first one since probably sixth or seventh grade (I didn’t go to any parties in high school…or college…or even after college), and it was one of those cases where I couldn’t tell whether or not I’d show up and EVERYONE would be dressed up, or NOBODY would be dressed up, and I’ll tell ya what – I chose wrong. To be fair, my buddy who invited me chose wrong, but I’ll dive on the grenade for him and take the blame here because he’s an idiot and I shouldn’t have trusted him in the first place.

But yeah, I showed up, EARLY, might I add, dressed like a fucking astronaut (shoutout Ryan Gosling in First Man and also shoutout the random NASA suit that I found in our office’s closet 2 seconds before stepping out the door), and I was the only person wearing a costume. I was also the only person in all of New York City, all five boroughs, wearing a costume on the way there. When I was on the subway platform, waiting for my train, I could actually see people across the tracks on the other platform taking pictures of me, the asshole in the orange NASA jumpsuit, and I hated it. I used to love Halloween, now it all just feels like the world’s trying to get one over on me and try to trick me into showing up to places I’m not supposed to be wearing a costume in – in costume. Halloween makes me paranoid now.

So Happy fuckin’ Halloween folks.

(Except you guys, Conor and Hugo, you get a Proper™, non-sarcastic Happy Halloween)