Icelandic Christmas Is Terrifying And I'm All About It

Send good vibes to the children of Iceland, because starting tonight through the 24th they’ll be visited by a string of trolls, and possibly even their mother, the ogress Grýla, who snags naughty kids & eats them. Puts our bags of coal to shame, really.

From the AP:

The people of northern Iceland have had their travel plans disrupted with a record high snowfall this December. Roads have been shut, flights cancelled and school suspended.

But for the children of this isolated North Atlantic island nation, the main worry is how the waist-high snow might affect the Icelandic Santa, Stekkjastaur, who comes to town Wednesday.

Stekkjastaur, after all, has a stiff peg-leg.

He is one of 13 mischievous troll brothers, called the Yule Lads, who have entertained and also frightened Icelandic children for hundreds of years.

Instead of a friendly Santa Claus, children in Iceland enjoy favors from the brothers, who come down from their mountain cave 13 days before Christmas according to folklore.

The brothers are loud, reckless, and have names like Door-Slammer, Window-Peeper, Meat-Hook, Candle-Stealer — reflecting their preferred method of pranks or criminal behavior. But they claim to be mostly rehabilitated, and Sausage-Swiper is now keen to host barbecues.

Yikes… You wake up in the morning & ‘ol Sausage Swiper’s at the foot of your bed wigglin’ brows. WYD?

As the AP noted, the trolls aren’t as ruthless as they used to be & today The Yule Lads are even on Twitter so you can follow along with their shenanigans year after year.

Have to say, though initially very creeped out by the whole thing, I love this. I’m all about it.

I don’t have kids but I’m kid-adjacent enough to know that the best part of the holidays is messing with them. This feels like a much edgier Elf On The Shelf x1000. Thirteen little creatures, each with their own weird thing, to delight (or terrify) the little ones with. Back in the day, no matter the time of year, my go-to babysitting move to regain control was reminding the kids that Santa was always watching. Worked like a charm. Imagine being able to say, “Cut it out. Meat Hook knows your every move.”

And that’s without even bringing Iceland’s Christmas Cat into it. You know, the giant, evil cat that eats all the poor kids who don’t get new coats for Christmas.

A delight! Well, happy holidays to the people of Northern Iceland. Hope you get lots of great stuff & that your kids make it out alive.