I Dont Think We're Saying Swag Anymore But This Cat Guy Has So Much Swag That We Are Bringing It Back

I mean my god. Lots of dudes dont like cats. I didnt like cats for a long time. After my old cat Pepper got murdered, I started to like cats. I adopted a kitten name Granger and now we are best friends. She sits with me all the time and I love her. There. I said it. I love my cat Granger.

That being said, I would give up Granger in one second flat to be draped in pussy like our friend here. What a glorious cat. Just puffy as hell and gives no fucks about anything. You walk down the street with a cat like that on your neck and people move mountains for you. Hell, you wear that all white cat with an all-white jumpsuit and you are halfway to being a cult leader, and whomst doesn’t wanna be a cult leader?

My only concern? The cat is fake. If that cat is fake, I might need to die because I dont wanna live in a world where this cat that I just found about isnt real. In these trying times, we need to have something to believe in. I believe in this man. I believe in this cat. I believe in my cat named Granger. I believe that Pepper was murdered unfairly and without cause. I stand behind those beliefs and will until the day that I die or until I take SOLE physical custody of the cat in this gif as pursuant under section 37B of the contract signed by the guy in white. It states quite clearly that all cat custody rights shall become null and void if – and you can read it for yourself in this photostatic copy – “I, the undersigned, shall forfeit all rights, privileges, and licenses herein and herein contained,” et cetera, et cetera…”Fax mentis incendium gloria cultum,” et cetera, et cetera…”Memo bis punitor delicatum!” It’s all there, black and white, clear as crystal! I SAID GOOD DAY, SIR!

GIVE ME THAT FUCKING CAT!