Top Nine Reasons Why You Got Fired From Buzzfeed (Number 7 Will Surprise You!)

1. In 2016, your company gets valued at 1.7 billion, you raise $500 million, and yet you still aren’t profitable after a decade in business. 

2. You published a massive story on President Trump’s alleged plan to build a tower in Moscow, and Robert Mueller’s team immediately called it inaccurate. 

3. You relied heavily on Facebook’s newsfeed for sharing. Then they got rid of it. 

4. In an effort to develop new revenue streams, you started a brick-and-mortar toy store. LOL. (actually this place looks awesome and as soon as I can convince a child to accompany me, I will check it out).  

5. You covered your site in banner ads. 

6. You tried to make a funny video, but you’re not a funny person. They still published it.

7. People get tired of reading listicles after #3. 

8. You’re one of the many writers who blatantly plagiarized work from other sources. Including Wikipedia!

9. You published the uncorroborated Steele Dossier, which included the allegation that Trump paid Russian hookers to pee on a bed that Obama had slept in. As much as we wanted it to be true, it probably wasn’t.