President Obama Gives His Thoughts About Having Women Clapping Their Buttcheeks While Wearing Gold Chains

Obama. Obama. Obama. This is the type of thing that you *checks notes for catchphrase* hate to see. Just because he was the president of the United States doesn’t mean that he gets to sit up there and talk about two things that I love with my whole heart without me firing back.

First of all, I love chains. I wear big ole gold chains all the time. It’s part of my style because I like to look fancy. There’s nothing wrong with that. My love for chains started the first time that I saw longtime stoolie Lil Waynes’ video, “The Block Is Hot.”

Conversely, my love for twerking started with another Cash Money Record’s video. This time it was Juvenile with his classic hit “Back That Ass Up.” If you dont like that song, fuck you, Mr. President.

Some people like to flaunt their money with gold chains. Some people like to flaunt their asses with dances that make them sound like they are giving a round of applause. Either way, it’s unamerican to tell someone what to do with their money or their ass.

Let necklaces bling and freedom ring.- Thomas Payne