Round 2 Voting Now Open For The Hottest TV Characters Ever, Plus A Full Breakdown of Round 1 Highlights
Breaking down a few highlights of the Round 1 matchups:
13 seed Karen Fillipelli defeating 4 seed Tiffany Malloy.
My reaction:
Nikki Cox was SO FUCKING HOT on Unhappily Ever After. And super slutty. She was Kelly Bundy 2.o and she was infinitely hotter than Karen from The Office. I dont know what happened here. Maybe the voters are too young. Maybe they didnt do their research. I’m baffled.
Kimberly The Pink Ranger Goes Down (In the tournament, that is. Not on you. Unless you’re the Red Ranger):
Honestly, I shoot you straight – I usually rig the 12 v 5’s so there are upsets so that the bracket mimics the real NCAA Tournament. Thats why I made the Pink Power Ranger a 12. And somehow she lost??? I now Thrones is hot in the streets. I know you saw Margarey naked. I know there’s recency bias. But the Pink Power Ranger is an ALL TIME sex minx. For a generation of guys, she was the girl who let them know they were straight. Shes like a Kelly Kapowski Light. JV version. Shes that influential. I thought nostalgia would prevail over recency bias but I was wrong.
Aunt Becky SLAUGHTERED Jenny Garth
Maybe its because Aunt Becky is a hardened criminal now. Maybe the fans like the Bad Girl. Maybe its that 90210 was a show about high school kids banging each other but when you really look at it, the girls werent that hot. Maybe Lori Loughlin really is just an all time rocket. Shes one of those few elite thats aging backwards. Whatever the reasoning, this was an 11 seed winning by 30 points
Caley Cuoco Another 11 Seed upset:
11 is the new 12! Usually you get the 12 seeds making runs, this bracket might see multiple 11 seeds making it to the sweet 16
Kimber from Nip/Tuck is underrated:
Nip/Tuck was one of those shows that guys who grew up Pre-Internet needed to rely upon to get some Nudity in their life. That show was as shallow as it gets. Nothing but plastic surgery, faces getting carved to pieces, and fucking. And Kimber was the trashiest bimbo of the bunch. Leighton Meester is very sexy but if you’re going based on characters, Kimber blows her out of the water:
Kelly Bundy was so slutty she took down Game of Thrones:
Kelly Bundy, the OG Slutty Sister on television, did what Nikki Cox, her successor, could not do – take out Game of Thrones. Nikki lost to Margarey Tyrell…Kelly manhandled fucking Cersei. Cersei! The sex bomb who wants dick so bad she lets her brother smash from behind. Thats crazy! Shout out to Kelly Bundy, one of the original slutty chicks:
I have always loved Kristin Kruek:
Look I’m not gonna get mad at anybody for picking a Baywatch lifeguard, but I just wanted to profess my love to Kristen Kruek from Smallville. I think shes like part Japanese part Native American and part Brazilian or some shit. I dunno. All I know is she was 100% perfect:
The world doesnt know about Bianca Kajilch:
Hayley Dunphy is a rocket, but Bianca Kajilch as Jennifer Morgan in the little known sitcom Rules of Engagement is one of the most underrated smokes ever. I think Landon Donovan married her for a bit? And I dont know what else shes been in. But she is CRIMINALLY underrated in Rules of Engagement:
Who will make it to the Sweet 16? Round 2 Voting: