The 9-Year-Old Who Won $1 Million in the Lottery After Winning a McLaren Coupe Can Go Straight to Hell

Source - A nine-year-old girl has won $1 million (£760,000) in a Dubai lottery, six years after she won a £200,000 McLaren Coupe in the same competition.

Eliza’s latest winning ticket was bought by her father, identified only as Mr M by Dubai Duty Free lottery officials after the draw at Dubai’s International Airport on Tuesday.

In 2013, when Eliza was aged just three, she won a McLaren sports car.

Her father said he bought her another ticket this year when she turned nine because he says it is a lucky number.

I’m a man of many faults, but generally speaking, envy isn’t one of them. I prefer Seven Deadly Sins to be more of the Sloth, Gluttony and Lust variety. It was Socrates or Sheryl Crow who said,”It’s not getting what you want, it’s wanting what you’ve got.” And they are both very wise.

That said, I can’t stand Eliza M. And her dad can fuck right off too with this “My 9-year-old won the lottery again” horseshit. Did she go down to the Dubai 7-Eleven and stand in line to buy her ticket? Did she wait there making small talk with all the tobacco-breathed, yellow-fingered, dead-eyed drones talking about what they’d do with the winnings? Did she slide her dirhams across the glass counter with the photocopies of previous winning tickets under it through the piles of silver oxide from all the scratchies that came before while the degenerate lowlifes behind her swapped sad tales about the time their numbers were one off from the jackpot?

If not, then stop lying about how the million bucks and the supercar are hers. The history of kids being told they’re special and can get everything they want thanks to dad and their own supernatural good fortune has never been good. And all you’re doing is creating a monster.

Not to mention ruining her for life. The worst thing that can happen to a kid is for them to have insane amounts of luck early on, before their minds are fully formed. It’s human nature that they’ll think odds-defying good things are owed to them and it will destroy their souls. I once sat behind a family at Fenway who told me it was their 9-year-old’s second Sox game ever. And at his first, he got two foul balls. Two. I’m a grown man who’s been going my whole life and never come within three rows of one. And my first thought was not only will this kid never appreciate his good fortune, he’ll be chasing that high the rest of his life and will never, ever find true happiness.

Now turn those grimy baseballs into a rare, high-performance driving machine and a million bucks. And that is what Mr. M has done to his daughter. So he can kiss my ass. He’s the worst kind of parent and deserves to have Eliza grow up miserable.