I Never Want Anyone To Ever Say Dave Portnoy Isn't A Man Of The People Ever Again

This brought a tear to my eye. Both eyes, actually. And it’s hard to bring tears to my eyes ever since I had laser eye surgery. I don’t blink very much either. Kinda strange. But this did the trick. There he is, David Scott Portnoy, hanging out with the common man. Look at him!

Tears, again. It’s beautiful. Dave has delivered millions of newspapers in his life. He hasn’t slept since ’97. Blogs 25 hours a day. Has launched the careers of dozens of mega stars. He’s a golden brown cookie and king of the beach. But despite all of that, he still took time out of his vacation, his hard earned vacation, to give back and spend time with a .251 hitter. What a mensch. You don’t see Deadspin hanging out with guys who are 93rd overall in WAR. You don’t see Bleacher Report leaving their Sancerre behind and going to Philadelphia to spend time with a guy who can’t sniff the All Star team. And that’s why Dave Portnoy is truly the common man.

So all those who say Davey isn’t the same Davey who drove the Astro Van, who developed a hunch from leaning over his computer all hours of the day, who said “Fuck Chiddy Bang, you guys can go fuck yourselves. Because there he is, still working, still making content with a guy who is 4th in the league in strikeouts. That’s my Davey Pageviews.