Roger Clemens Called Me Out For Wanting To Hit Dingers Off Him As A Kid, Said Let Try To Make It "Reality, Reality"...Wait, What?!?!?!
Backstory: I do my usual daily Barstool Snapchat Show song and dance where I, and about a dozen other Barstool folk, waltz in to the Snap studio, do a take or two for the kiddos, and go on with the day. It’s the definition of a Bada-Bing, Bada-Boom process that takes maybe 5-10 min per shot. Well, last week I did a take on Playstation 5 and wanted a built in Virtual Reality component (not a damn accessory) where I can, among other things, hit moonshots off the greats like Roger Clemens…and then completely forgot about it. Like, totally put it out of my mind until Dave Portnoy approached me, asked why Clemens is beefing, and I STILL had no fucking idea what he was talking about. Then I saw The Real Rocket’s story and, well, here’s something I never though would happen in this life or the next. 7-time Cy Young Award Winner (SEVEN!!!!) Roger Clemens called me out on his IG story for wanting to hit dingers* off him as a kid and live out that experience in Virtual Reality. Clemens said, let’s make it “Reality, Reality”, which is cool? I guess? I still don’t know whether he thinks I’m a Make-A-Wish kid and is going to throw soft meatballs down the pipe or if the 57-year-old wants to relive the Glory Days and put one square in the earhole. Either/or, I’ll have my Omaha 3000 ready to ping. Just nobody tell him I grew up the town next to Piazza’s. Feel like that could be bad mojo.
*Honestly just said the first ’90’s pitcher that came to my head…and now it may lead to facing off against one of the greatest pitchers of all-time. Everything coming up Smitty! Well, unless Shaq sees that from the same exact Snapchat story that I’d dunk on him so hard that I’d split his dick in two. In Virtual reality, of course. I think.