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You Take Hockey Away From Canadians And They Find A Coronavirus Vaccine Just Like That

Saskatchewan - The University of Saskatchewan’s Vaccine and Infectious Disease Organization-International Vaccine Centre says a Corona-Virus vaccine has been produced that is now being tested in animals. However, there is still a long road ahead to manufacturing a vaccine for human use.

...He added that he is pretty positive the vaccine will work, they are currently a few weeks away from finishing this stage of research, and will need to send any viable vaccine away to clinical studies before it would be safe for human use.

Those goofy Canuck bastards, man. Turns out all the world needed was to take hockey away from Canadians in order to save everybody. It's also important to note that the NLL season has been suspended, as well as pretty much every major curling competition in Canada. I'd say suspending the NHL season had at least 75% to do with how quickly this vaccine was developed, but making sure they didn't have any other Canadian sports to turn to during this time was crucial as well. 

The SEC always wants to talk about how much they love football and how much "it just means more", but it doesn't even come close to hockey in Canada. Granted, this global pandemic didn't occur during college football season so it's not necessarily as pressing of an issue for them. But still, I doubt the SEC would put their money where their mouth is and develop a vaccine for this shit as quickly as Canada did once they realized there was no more hockey to watch. I mean this was within hours of the season getting suspended. Todd and Gordo over here realized they weren't going to get to watch their Saskatoon Blades take on the Brandon Wheat Kings so they just went to work. 

They got pucks deep, they battled in the corners, they crashed the net hard, they weren't afraid to get a little greasy out there and after playing their brand of science for a full 60 minutes, they came up with a vaccine that is now in the testing stages. And now we know for future reference. If it ever looks like the world is coming towards the end and there's no help in sight, just take hockey away from Canadians. It gives them superhuman powers like when you hear those stories about a mother lifting a truck above her head to free a trapped baby from underneath.