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Woman Wants To Hire Hitman, Goes To RentAHitman.com For Assistance, Promptly Gets Arrested For Trying To Hire Hitman

Before I even read a word of this article - before the proverbial beans are spilled - we just need to talk about this move. It almost makes you feel bad for this lady. Not in the sense that I feel bad she tried to hire a hitman and failed. No, I mostly feel bad because she thought you could just fire up google and find a hitman. Nothing to it, just google it and you've got yourself a killer for hire. She'd have as much luck scouring google for hard drugs or pictures of a skinny Brandon Walker. It's just not gonna happen. Pretty staggering to see that there are this many people that still don't know how to use the internet in the slightest bit. 

Source

MONROE, Mich. (WXYZ) — Michigan State Police say a 51-year-old South Rockwood woman was arrested last week for allegedly trying to hire a hitman to kill her ex-husband.

Wendy Wein allegedly contacted a fake website called www.rentahitman.com, which claims to offer hitmen to solve problems.

Giphy Images.

Ah yes. The ever-reliable rentahitman.com. If there was ever a faux-hitman operation on the internet, I doubt it would be named rentahitman.com. That name seems pretty legitimate to me!

How do you not spot that as a potential fake website? Rentahitman.com might be the fakest name of all time. It's so fake that it's honestly shocking they used it as the fake name. Too fake, some may argue. Which is why it's crazy that someone genuinely went through and filled out all of the forums. 

Wein allegedly filled out a service request form on the website and requested a consultation to help with the issue, saying her ex-husband was the target.

The owner of the website then contacted Michigan State Police because he was concerned that Wein was trying to kill her ex-husband.

An undercover state trooper posed as a hitman and met Wein in a parking lot in South Rockwood. She offered him $5,000 to murder her ex, who lives in another state, and provided him with an up-front payment for travel expenses.

Talk about a slippery slope. One second you're just perusing options to kill your ex, the next you're being arrested whilst being laughed at by a 20-year-old (birthday is on Thursday, nbd) who still shares a bedroom with his brother. Life comes at you fast, huh?

This lady must've thought she was in the clear. All she had to do was actually meet the hitman, pay him, and she was all gravy, right? Wrong. You'll never believe this, but the whole thing was just a sting operation. No hitmen. Just false promises. In all seriousness though, that must be an all-time "well, fuck" moment. When the fake hitmen takes the money and arrest you. Must be terribly embarrassing. It just reminds me of when Badger gets busted by the undercover cop in Breaking Bad after like five minutes of trying to get him to prove he wasn't a cop.

I feel like a good rule of thumb is that if you think someones a cop, just assume they are. You can't be taking any chances. Then again, if you have to be busted by an undercover cop, you were probably doing some really shady shit and deserve to be locked up. Which is why it's so easy to look at this woman and laugh at her misstep.

Well, as they say, live and learn. Now this woman understands that the internet isn't just some playland where you can just get whatever you want. You'll have to make the treacherous journey into the dark web for that. Chances are that if she wasn't able to figure out that you can't just find anything on the top page of Google, she'll never figure out how to make it to the dark web.