Suspended Heavyweight Jarrell Miller Blames His Positive PED Tests on Penis Enhancement Pills

Source - Disgraced heavyweight boxer Jarrell Miller has claimed his most recent failed drugs test is down to a sexual performance pill he'd been using.

The undefeated American had been given another chance after serving a six-month suspension under the WBA for failing multiple drugs tests ahead of his world title showdown with Anthony Joshua last year, only for his comeback fight against Jerry Forrest in July to be cancelled due to another positive test for a banned substance. 

It was Miller's fourth failed test in 12 months and several figureheads in boxing called for a lifetime ban to be issued after his license was temporarily suspended by the Nevada State Athletic Commission (NSAC). ...

Sportsmail has seen documents sent to Miller and his team from the Korva Scientific lab in Los Angeles - which was signed off by one of the world's leading anti-doping experts Paul Scott - and tests results have indicated the presence of GW501516 in the 'widely available' Black Ant male sexual stimulant he claims to have taken 30 or more days before that drug test.   

He told Sportsmail that he has taken this Viagra-type pill on several occasions and had not made the connection the first time after testing positive.

I've never been the biggest anti-PED purist in the world. I've always believed that most of my favorite moments in a lifetime squandered enjoying watching the sportsball athletes do their thing were lousy with guys pumped full enough sweet, sweet performance enhancers to DQ them from the Kentucky Derby. And that's been borne out by the evidence. Show me a great, memorable, cherished sporting event of your lifetime and I can almost guarantee some of the parties most responsible had more pharmaceuticals in their blood streams than in your average drug mule's lower intestine. And thanks for the great memories, guys. I regret nothing. 

Which is why I find Jarrell Miller trying to excuse away his suspension this way kind of an odd choice. I mean, the days of PED-shaming are long since behind us. These aren't the days when the world was tenting their fingers at Mark McGwire stammering like an idiot and Sammy Sosa pretending he no habla Ingles at those stupid grandstanding Congressional hearings. So Miller got suspended. A bunch of times. Serve this one. Say nothing. Get a better masking agent. Come back good as new the way they do in the team sports. No one cares. 

Which is what makes blaming it on Penis Enhancing Drugs all the more curious decision. Sure, maybe since you can't listen to a commercial break on terrestrial sports talk radio without somebody talking about some kind of dong medicine, erectile dysfunction doesn't have the stigma it used to. But there's still some residual out there. More than with simple doping, anyway.

I'm trying to look at this from my own perspective. Let's say someone accused me of the worst sin a writer can commit: Plagiarism. Even if I'm not guilty, I think just for the sake of my own male ego, I'd rather have the world think I stole from a comedic genius like Rick Reilly or the Cool Kids of the Internet (from wherever site they're at now after they flamed out at Deadspin) than believe my erections are insufficient. I'd cop to the crime before I'd blame my flaccid man parts. And I'm like twice Jarrell Miller's age. 

Maybe the truth is on his side and he's just being honest. In which case I admire his courage. While stating again I would rather be thought of as a cheater who can achieve and maintain an adequate boner than someone who plays by the rules but needs help in that department. But that's just me and my insecurities. If you need help with ED, consult your doctor. And if you're someone who needs to pass a PED screen for your job, you might consider a prescription med from the pharmacy instead of the "widely available" Black Ant pills.