BREAKING: The Weeknd Announced He Will Be Performing At This Year's Super Bowl Halftime Show

So it looks like The Weeknd is our Super Bowl Halftime Performer this year (or at least one of them) if there is a Super Bowl (or a Super Bowl Halftime Show). 

Now look, I've been a huge Weeknd fan ever since his music made its way to the New York suburbs. In fact, I'm such a huge fan that I called this announcement 4 years ago.

How about this tweet coming in juuuuuuuuuust under the gun? #Clemstradamus

HOWEVAH, I have to say as a lumpy white dude with very little rhythm that clearly knows about the art of dance, let me say that Abel needs to bring the fucking thunder to whatever fans are allowed at this Super Bowl. Because shit like this isn't going to fly on the biggest stage in sports.

Especially not when it has to follow up this nuke that was dropped on hundred of millions peoples heads at the last Super Bowl Halftime Show.

Or that one of the other pop megastars that came up around the same time as The Weeknd put on what I consider to be the greatest Super Bowl Halftime Show ever.

However, considering the sick catalog he already has and the show he put on at the VMAs with nobody around, I think The Weeknd will be just fine with the finest lights, smoke machines, and smokeshows that Pepsi's money can buy.