The NCAA Saves Us Again -They Are Petitioning To Make A Urologist Drop 'Vasectomy Mayhem' Because It's Too Confusing With 'March Mayhem'

Phew that was close. Thanks to the NCAA for saving my fertility because here I was ready to go to Vasectomy Mayhem to watch a bunch of college basketball and eat a bunch of wings. Now I know it's where you go get a vasectomy and not March Mayhem - the common term for the NCAA Tournament aka March Madness aka the Dance. When you think NCAA Tournament, you think March Mayhem. Seriously, who the fuck calls it March Mayhem? Show yourself. You need to be kept away from society because this is the Wal Mart version of the NCAA Tournament. 

Listen, I had to go Big J here. I had to go right to someone who had a vasectomy in the eye of the public to ask if he'd be confused: 

And Clem's official statement: 

That's why he's the best in the business folks. 

But he's right. This is such a cock sucker move by the NCAA. Just embrace that guys become infertile because they have the opportunity to lay around and watch college basketball four hours on end. There's a reason this is the popular week to lose the ability to have a kid. This is just peak NCAA though. Petitioning to lose Vasectomy Mayhem. I need to know the single person walking in there confused that it's not a sports bar. 

Thanks to the NCAA for keeping us safe. That was a close one. Now I completely understand why they haven't figured out name, image and likeness or video games yet. Bigger things on the plate.