The Possibilities Of An HBO Amusement Park Truly Are Endless

WHAT an Idea. 

In all honesty how has NO ONE thought of this yet? We think all these massive brands have marketing geniuses or whatever the fuck that means yet no one is focusing on making an HBO-themed amusement park. Once you thinkk about it it really does make sense- why let Disney and Universal get all the shine when we're in 2021 baby? Spider-man and Jaws are cool and all, but when you put them up against Kenny Powers & Tony Soprano? I think I'll be taking the latter on that showdown. And when I say the possibilities of this park are endless...I mean the possibilities are endless. 

First you have 48402857 shows at your disposal to make rides off of. I've never even watched Westworld yet I'm confident you can do some dumb futuristic high-tech rollercoaster off that. The tweet above suggests a Sopranos river cruise which wouldn't be the worst thing in the world- I definitely think the Sopranos ride would need to be one of those lowkey rides where you can just sit back and enjoy what you're seeing...kind've like a small world. You can easily have a Kenny Powers-themed baseball type ride much like the Buzz Lightyear ride at Disney. How about a VR Entourage experience where you make Vince's career choices? YUP. And obviously as much as we're all mad at it don't even get me STARTED on the potential for Game of Thrones rollercoasters. I've played rollercoaster tycoon once or twice in my day & I know just how profitable a group of 3 coasters named Viserion, Drogon, and Rhaegal could be.

Now onto what I think would be BY FAR the coolest part of the HBO amusement park. This may shock you but...it's the food and drink. Think REAL LIFE brick & mortar stores from all of your favorite HBO Shows. After hopping off Rhaegal the dragon ride you head over to Al-Abba's chicken for some palestinian chicken. If you're one of the folks who don't the big rides, but loves the Sopranos & likes to relax you can enjoy the river cruise followed by a heart meal at Nuovo Vesuvio. Not to mention the late night crowd would LOVE this place. Once the kiddies head home for the night you can head over to Al Swearengen's Gem Saloon for some late night or, of course, the Bada Bing. That'll really make ya feel like Vinny Chase for the night.

HBO needs to do this. They just simply do. Fuck it, put it in the middle of one of the Dakota's for all I care. If they build it...I will come. What a dream that'd be.