N'Keal Harry Requests a Trade in the Cringiest Way Possible

Elise Amendola. Shutterstock Images.

I'll leave it to amateur Barstool historians and the legion of Old Balls trivia experts to do the research and tell me if I'm right or wrong on this one. But as far as I can recall, this is the first time I've ever done N'Keal Harry posts on consecutive days. He just hasn't done enough blogworthy things in the 26 or so months since the Patriots drafted him. 

And yet here we are. Yesterday it was a report that 2019's 32nd overall pick's roster spot is in jeopardy:

Followed immediately by this statement from his agent, that they've been asking for a trade all along: 

I don't know this Jamal Tooson. He's probably a good agent. I've never heard of him but he gets the benefit of the doubt. Besides, I get how legal representation works. Your defense lawyer isn't after "justice," he/she is paid to get you an acquittal. Your divorce attorney isn't seeking what's best for the whole family, they're trying to get as much as they can from that no good two-timer who did you wrong. And a player's agent doesn't get a cut by worrying about the team's best interests. It's all about putting the client in the best position to succeed so they can maximize their earnings.

So in that regards, asking for a trade for N'Keal Harry is just good advocacy. Harry and Tooson know that being in the best position to succeed isn't likely to happen for him in New England, just by reading the depth chart. But what they failed to do was read the room. 

For starters, that stuff about working with the team quietly behind the scenes and a fresh start is great. And something the coaches, the front office and the coach who IS the front office in Foxboro has always been willing to do. If you're a good soldier and done your job, but it's time for a change of scenery, they'll give you hugs on the way out the door like you're Michael Scott leaving Scranton to go marry Holly. Think Vince Wilfork. And, when possible, they'll facilitate a trade to a place you can succeed, like they did with Jimmy Garoppolo in 2017 and Marcus Cannon this year. 

But complaining about Harry's touches is an awful, terrible, no good, very bad look. It's the kind of thing you expect from a Pop Warner mom. And is utterly tone deaf given that the last quarterback Harry had got 59 receptions on 81 targets from Jakobi Meyers and 47 on 77 from Damiere Byrd. And his first is famous for saying "My favorite receiver is the one that's open." Something that, according to the analytics anyway, Harry rarely ever is. 

This is what a political advisor would call, bad optics. But we can call embarrassing as fuckall. Especially when, like I pointed out yesterday, this is how Harry stacks up so far among the wideouts taken in the first three rounds two years ago:

Now is not the time to be deflecting blame. Or to be insinuating that Harry was in anyway "dominant," a "downfield threat," or "unstoppable," virtually or otherwise at Arizona. In fact, he was one of the five or so slowest wideouts tested at the Combine. What he was considered, is a tough, physical, big body who'll out muscle smaller defenders for 50/50 balls and pick up 1st downs. Here's what I wrote before the draft about him:

While he’s not an explosive player, he feeds off contested catches, comebackers and back shoulder throws. He’s been largely considered a potential Day 2 pick thanks to his toughness and pro-level body control when fighting for balls. But word is he’s dropping down draft boards as personnel guys aren’t seeing suddenness in and out of his breaks or explosiveness. The comparisons to Devin Funchess aren’t helping. But in a short passing/controlled offense, he could definitely find a role.

If he was ever considered an unstoppable force of nature on the back end of a secondary and leave deep safeties soiling themselves at the very thought of having to be humiliated by his domidownfieldthreatiness, I missed it. And apparently so did the rest of the world. Because this is the first time any of this has come up. 

And if the goal is, as it should be, to get Harry out from under a depth chart that has Meyers ahead of him, Nelson Agholor and Kendrick Bourne ahead of Meyers, very possibly Gunner Olszewski and Isaiah Zuber ahead of Harry too, and oh, by the way, a two tight end offense, this is absolutely the wrong way to go about it. A clumsy, ham-handed approach. Trying to leverage GM Bill into a trade when you have no leverage. Trading Harry right now would be the ultimate example of buying high and selling low. Selling your shares in the Bailey Brothers Building & Loan to Potter for one Weimar Republic pfennig on the dollar. 

I mean, what exactly do they think the going rate is right now for a receiver with one more career yard than Andy Isabella? Because my guess is it's probably Andy Isabella. Or someone like him. Some other distressed asset that someone else overpaid for that they're looking to unload. And for sure not a draft pick, because you'd be lucky to get a conditional 6th or 7th rounder for Harry at this point. And still have to take a $2 million cap hit. Harry-for-Isabella just seems plausible because they'd each be going back to the state where they went to school. And maybe whatever traits they showed that made them top 62 picks three drafts ago will magically reemerge and salvage their careers. 

But to me, it's more likely the Pats just keep Harry, hope he shows enough in camp and the preseason games to either give them hope he can contribute or up his trade value. Which right now, it's negligible. No matter how much his paid advocate blames it on his lack of "opportunity."