I Now Shower In Beans, And Will Never Shower Differently Ever Again

Holy shit, what a steal! What a find! I have bamboozled this company. I paid only ~$40 for this shower head that revolutionized my bathroom. The old shower head wasn't giving me terrible water pressure, but this thing? Holy shit.

Online, it looks fucking absurd. But my shower head exploded one day last week, as I told Vibbs...

…so I needed a new one. With water shooting out of the arm in all directions, my only solution was to finally shower in beans. This shit is all over TikTok and Instagram Reels, so I was quite confident it would work…

But if you follow me, you know I have a fucking TERRIBLE history with buying bullshit online. I bought, like a fucking moron, two lunchboxes on Kickstart for $200 back in the summer of 2017. I started tweeting about it, finally, in 2019, documenting my journey with this awful situation…

The ending of this saga was bad. After almost four years, the lunchbox ended up being (SHOCKER!) a massive piece of shit. So everyone was ready to clown me when I bought the beans shower head… but HA, jokes on them. We found a winner.

I'll be drowning in beans all weekend, take care, everyone.

NOTE: I have no idea what the fuck the beans do.