A "Good Samaritan" Turned In 69 Pounds Of Cocaine He Found While Out Boating In The Florida Keys

NY Post - A boater found a massive package of cocaine floating in the water off the Florida Keys on Saturday, officials said.

The massive package, weighing 69 pounds, was estimated to have a $1 million street value, a US Border Patrol official told The Miami Herald.

The package was recovered off Islamorada in the Upper Keys, the official said.

The waters off the Florida Keys have had some other incidents with “high tides” as recently as March, when a snorkeler spotted a floating bale with 25 bricks estimated at a street value of more than $1.5 million.

Ever since I started writing on this website in 2013, there have been some constants in stories you see year after year after year. One is homeless people cleaning up streets for beer. Another is people going ape shit because the McDonald's worker forgot to give them ketchup. And then the third is this- bricks of cocaine being found by boaters in Florida. No matter how much things change in the world, you can always set your watch to millions of dollars of cocaine being turned in to authorities by a "good samaritan"...and the question I have had each and every time, "but how much did they keep?".

Every time I see a story like this, I think well duh, you can't keep 70 pounds worth of cocaine you found floating in the ocean. I logistically do not know how I would sell 70 pounds of damp cocaine. I am not a drug dealer, I want that on the record. And if I had a pyramid of yayo in my apartment I would get way, wayyyyy too paranoid and anxious about it. If I have it, that means someone is looking for it, I don't need that on my conscious. But....1 brick? I think I can put that in the back of the closet and find a way to monetize it. I'm not a drug dealer, but I'm also not stupid either. When presented with free money I'm never one to turn it down. 

I'm not condoning being a drug mule. I don't want anyone reading this to glorify being the next El Chapo. Buttttt if you find a little bit of the nose clams while out on your boat, maybe a finder's fee isn't too terrible of a prize. Call up some friends, have a responsible night on the slopes, and let the police deal with the rest. No harm, no foul. Responsibly.