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Welcome to Barstool Sports, Jon Gruden

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Barstool Confessions

<!DOCTYPE html><html lang="en"><head><meta charset="utf-8"><meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width,initial-scale=1,maximum-scale=1,user-scalable=no,shrink-to-fit=no"><title>Friday Confessions</title><link rel="stylesheet" type="text/css" href="https://htlbid.com/v3/barstoolsports.com/htlbid.css"><script async src="https://htlbid.com/v3/barstoolsports.com/htlbid.js"></script><script>window.htlbid=window.htlbid||{},htlbid.cmd=htlbid.cmd||[],htlbid.cmd.push((function(){htlbid.setTargeting("pagetype","blog"),htlbid.setTargeting("brandId","150"),htlbid.setTargeting("authorId","63390"),htlbid.setTargeting("tags",["friday-confessions","dante"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_keywords",["confessions","friday confessions | barstool sports","button","move","close door","older couple","fridays","dante","stoolies","luggage","clicks","blog series","comment section","look","last week"]),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_neutral","0.86"),htlbid.setTargeting("Verity_negative","0.14"),htlbid.setTargeting("is_testing","no"),htlbid.layout()}))</script><script>var googletag = googletag || {};
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        pbjs.setConfig({ pageUrl: https://www.barstoolsports.com/blog/3411341/friday-confessions });</script><script src="https://d9rde3y35j061.cloudfront.net/script.js"></script><script src="https://htlbid.com/v3/barstoolsports.com/htlbid.js" async></script><script src="https://iframely.barstoolsports.com/embed.js" async></script><style>.union__content{font-family:-apple-system,HelveticaNeue,Roboto,sans-serif;font-weight:400;font-size:18px;color:#5a5b5d;word-wrap:break-word;box-sizing:border-box;padding:0 5px 32px 5px}.union__content p{padding:0;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content img{display:block;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content video{display:block!important;width:100%!important;height:auto;margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content .articleAd{text-align:center;margin:16px 0 0 0;background-color:#f5f5f5}.union__content .htlad__container{display:inline-block}.union__content p a{color:#377dc4}.union__content .oembed__wrapper{margin:16px 0 0 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){display:block;margin:16px 0 0 0;padding:4px 12px;border-left:4px solid #77889a;font-style:italic;background:#f0f4f8;text-align:left;border-radius:0 6px 6px 0}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video) p{font-style:italic}.union__content blockquote,q{quotes:none}.union__content iframe{max-width:100%}.union__content .bs-image-hidden{display:none}.union__content div.hq-image{width:fit-content;margin:0 auto}.union__content span.image-attribution,.union__content span.image-attribution a{color:#757575;font-size:12px;font-style:italic;letter-spacing:.1px;line-height:14px;text-decoration:none;padding:0;margin:0}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer .bs-videoPlayer__container,.union__content video-js,.wp-video{width:100%!important;height:0!important;position:relative;padding-bottom:56.25%;overflow:hidden;margin:16px 0 0 0}.wp-video video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.hq-image video{width:100%!important;height:100%!important}.union__content .bs-videoPlayer__container>iframe{position:absolute;top:0;left:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:none}@media (prefers-color-scheme:dark){.union__content,body,html{background:#1c1c1c;color:#f1f1f1}.union__content blockquote:not(.twitter-video){border-left:4px solid #367dc4;background:#272c35}}</style><script>window.addEventListener("applicationDidBecomeActive",(()=>{document.querySelectorAll(".hq-image video[autoplay]").forEach((e=>e.play()))}))</script></head><body class="union__content"><p>Dante and I alternate Fridays collecting confessions from deprived Stoolies... It's a blog series aimed at getting clicks from the Comment Section, and they rarely disappoint.</p><p>But I'll go first…</p><p style="text-align:center"><em><span style="color:#b8312f">Last week, after checking into the Hilton, I executed the classic no-look hit-the-<strong>CLOSE DOOR</strong></span></em><span style="color:#b8312f"><em>-</em></span><em><span style="color:#b8312f">button-move while an older couple approached with luggage asking me to hold the elevator I was in.</span></em></p><p style="text-align:center"><em><span style="color:#b8312f">I sheepishly shrugged and mouthed the words "I'm sorry" as the doors closed in their wrinkled faces while I pretended to search for the <strong>OPEN DOOR </strong>button.</span></em></p><p>If there's anything you need to get off your chest, then the comments are open.</p><p>Two Hail Marys, three Our Fathers, and slip a 20 in the collection box on the way out… All is forgiven.</p><p>-Large</p></body></html>

<p>Dante and I alternate Fridays collecting confessions from deprived Stoolies... It's a blog series aimed at getting clicks from the Comment Section, and they rarely disappoint.</p><p>But I'll go first…</p><p style="text-align:center"><em><span style="color:#b8312f">Last week, after checking into the Hilton, I executed the classic no-look hit-the-<strong>CLOSE DOOR</strong></span></em><span style="color:#b8312f"><em>-</em></span><em><span style="color:#b8312f">button-move while an older couple approached with luggage asking me to hold the elevator I was in.</span></em></p><p style="text-align:center"><em><span style="color:#b8312f">I sheepishly shrugged and mouthed the words "I'm sorry" as the doors closed in their wrinkled faces while I pretended to search for the <strong>OPEN DOOR </strong>button.</span></em></p><p>If there's anything you need to get off your chest, then the comments are open.</p><p>Two Hail Marys, three Our Fathers, and slip a 20 in the collection box on the way out… All is forgiven.</p><p>-Large</p>