Orphan Rhino Baby Tries To Adopt Grey SUV As His Mother

Screen Shot 2015-08-10 at 2.11.08 PMScreen Shot 2015-08-10 at 2.11.17 PMScreen Shot 2015-08-10 at 2.11.30 PM

NYDN - An orphaned baby rhinoceros in South Africa has tried to make a Jeep his new “mom.” Donnie, whose mother was killed by poachers, saw the similar-colored vehicle and rubbed his body against the side of the car, reports Metro. One eyewitness, Debbie English, posted on Facebook: “This little guy lost his mom and wandered all the way over to the tourist road. Then adopted cars as his mommy … how heart-wrenching.”  This phenomenon is regularly seen by safari guides in many animal species, when they lose their mother, with some baby wildebeest running for kilometres to keep up with their new “mom” as a safari vehicle drives away.Donnie was later tranquilized by a vet and taken to a new, undisclosed home in South Africa’s Kruger National Park.  But even that did not go smoothly, as Donnie reacted badly to the drug and had to be resuscitated. He recovered and has now settled into his new home, reports Metro.

Well if this dopey little rhino isnt just the saddest most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. Snuggling up against that Hyundai like a little rhino idiot. I’m not saying this is the smartest rhinoceros I’ve ever seen. I’m also not saying he’s the toughest. I mean lets be honest, rhinos are like 1 step away from dinosaurs and dinosaurs did not give a FUCK about their moms and dads. If a triceratops’ mom died you think he’d start snuggling with a Hyundai? No. Primarily because cars didnt exist back then but the larger point being that dinosaurs werent pussies. They just saw their dead mom and kept it moving so that they wouldnt be eaten by a T rex or something.

But that was like millions of years ago. And now rhinos are dino descendants. And just like everything else this day and age, things have gone soft. And if your mom dies you get all sad and like an idiot anything thats big and grey your automatically assume is your mom. I mean I know your heart hurts little man but you’re telling me you cant tell the difference between a rhinoceros and an automobile? You, yourself, are a fucking rhino. How can you confuse your own species with a car? I dunno man it just seems like you’re kinda doomed if you’re in the wild and subject to that whole Survival of the Fittest thing. Probably best to just stay in captivity and be the sad little rhino with the Hyundai mom.