The Fact Somebody Called The Police On This “Cousin Eddie” Christmas Lawn Decoration Is Everything That’s Wrong With America

Fox - Police in Shepherdsville, Kentucky, were called to the scene of a man allegedly exposing himself outside a home — only to find out it was simply an elaborate tribute to a beloved Christmas movie. 

When police arrived on the scene on Wednesday, Dec. 21, they were relieved to learn that no crime was occurring that day in the small city about 20 miles south of Louisville: It was just a mannequin belonging to a "National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation" movie super-fan, as local Fox affiliate WDRB-TV reported.

A dispatcher in Shepherdsville described the scene as that of "a male standing outside. He is naked. He has a robe covering part of his body. He is exposing himself, and he has a hose between his legs."

Sad.

Whatever happened to minding your own business?

I don’t buy for one second the communists who called in this complaint thought it was “a naked man exposing himself” in his yard. And you shouldn’t either.

This was pure, soft as baby shit, hating. Old school tattle telling, to the police, in hopes they’d go pay this house a visit, and make the owner remove a (hilarious) Christmas decoration they found offensive.

Officers on the scene did not make any arrest or citation. Instead, they "did get a laugh and took some photos of the display," said WDRB-TV. 

But nope, the responding officers also got the joke, and thought it was funny as shit. 

The mannequin belonged to Joni Keeney, who said that "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" is her favorite Christmas movie, and that "everybody has a ‘Cousin Eddie' in their family, everybody." 

Couldn’t agree more Joni. Maybe not to the extent where they’re frying their steaks on radioactive rocks, and pumping shit into a neighborhood sewer in their underwear, but we get the point. Keep spreading the Christmas spirit. 

P.s.- A+ job outlining the cat on the chair. Talk about attention to detail. I see you player. 

P.p.s.- if big “Christmas Vacation”/ Clark Griswold fan Tom Brady is reading this, he has no choice but to add this to his over-the-top Christmas decorations next year.