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Good News Mets Fans: Steve Cohen's Hedge Fund Made A BOATLOAD Of Money Last Year

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If you’re a fan of income inequality and fat cats getting fatter I have FANTASTIC news: Steve Cohen’s hedge fund printed money last year.

How much? Well, for a dude with a checkered past (for the record, Steve Cohen's name was cleared of any wrongdoing), he put up the kinda numbers that would get his ass the “random drug test” treatment if he was playing a professional sport. His fund pulled in $2.4 billion, and he netted $1.7 billion personally.

To put things in context, Cohen paid just $2.4 billion for the Mets. And he's only spent $800 million so far this offseason.

NY Post - New York Mets owner Steve Cohen’s Point72 hedge fund generated more than $2.4 billion in profits for investors last year.

Point72, whose headquarters are located in Stamford, Conn., posted a 10.3% net gain in 2022 despite economic headwinds, according to data from LCH Investments, which was cited by Financial Times.

Cohen, whose net worth has been valued by Bloomberg at nearly $13 billion, pocketed $1.7 billion in personal capital gains from his hedge fund, according to Institutional Investor.

Cohen’s investment firm makes its money through what is known as a long-short equity strategy. In other words, Point72 takes a long position on underpriced stocks while selling short positions on securities that are overvalued.

Cohen's girthy gains (which certainly, 100% weren't the byproduct of flouting securities laws) are more impressive when you consider that the markets in 2022 might have been the only thing more fucked than whatever is actually wrong with Carlos Correa’s leg. 

Most hedge funds (and pretty much everyone else) got destroyed by market volatility in the year of our lord 2022. Masters of the universe are just like us, you guys… well, except they lose other people's money… and they get paid either way.

And I've got receipts. There were almost $125B in performance losses in the hedge fund industry in 2022. And given the atrocious performance, it isn't exactly surprising that there were more than $55B in net outflows (read: rich people pulled their money out). That the largest flight of capital since 2016.

Meanwhile, at Point72…

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