We Got A Brand New Succession Season 4 Trailer And Shit Is About To Pop Off!!!

To be clear, I THINK shit is about to pop off even though I'm not 100% certain since I'm not sure if shit has ever popped off before. I mean we've had a ton of drama including a near death experience, a son stabbing his father in the back, and constant corporate hijinks that helped me learn what a proxy war is. Okay, that's not true. But I have a vague idea of what a proxy war might be.

Actually, I just remembered that Logan sold Waystar to that Euro dude who made me feel extra dumb every time he was on screen that I just found out has this as his headshot on Amazon Prime, IMDB, and I imagine anywhere else he is listed.

So now I guess this is all just setting up for a Logan Family Battle Royale starting on March 26th and I cannot wait. Here are some quick thoughts after watching the trailer.

- You know at some point the kids will hear the voice of their dad and it'll be a great big FUCK OFF that will cause all of our TVs to shake at home. The unofficial odds have Kendall at -1000 as the target of that Fuck Off.

- I am excited yet scared of whatever deplorable shit Roman has up his cufflinked sleeves. Then again, we should've expected nothing less from a guy that was known as the bedwetting kid from Home Alone.

I also have no clue where him and Gerri head next, but much of my excitement stems from that.

- As the official conductor of the #ShivWagon, I'll admit that things didn't end well for our girl considering her husband hoodwinked, bamboozled, led astray, run amok, and flat out deceived sweet Shiv.

But that's fine. There are still plentyyyyy of Succession episodes left to shake out and our girl needed a betrayal like that for her to kill the angel on her shoulder as the moral Roy closest thing there is to a moral Roy. Fear not #ShivWagon, we will be riding the caboose all the way to the top of the org chart by the season finale, just like I did with Bran Stark on the #BranWagon once upon a time.

- Speak of the devil, it looks like ol' Tommy Wambsgans is currently in the cat bird seat (I think I'm using that term right) of the familial power structure, even if Shiv allows him to break their sacred bond of matrimony. However, let's all remember the last time a guy who came up in parks moved way up the org chart.

Please don't pay attention to any major world events that may have happened after March 2020 that could've impacted Disney's bottom line

I like Tom because he's the perfect embodiment of corporate motherfucker with a pinch of Midwest charm and I've always wondered if heartening was a word, which it officially is regardless of what that bitch Merriam-Webster says because any show that plays in the prime HBO 9 PM ET slot is bigger than the dictionary. 

I used to be disheartened as a Mets fan when the Wilpons owned them. Then Steve Cohen bought the team and I am heartened. It is so heartening. And I am heartened by this news.

- Greg The Egg rules. I don't really think I have to add anything else other than that and I can't wait to see him back on my TV failing upwards while playing whatever cruise incident documents are left. I feel an obligation to include the One Bite pizza review where the actor that plays Greg The Egg just happened to walk up to Portnoy while he was shooting before Frankie recognized him.

I also feel an obligation as an Egghead to say FUCK GREENPEACE!!!

- I'm so happy for these crazy kids. I've never seen a marriage that is more destined to last than this blessed union.

#MyFuturePresident

- Finally I gotta give a shout out to these two mamalukes.

They may not be the biggest names or heaviest hitters in the show. But goddamn do Frank and Karl bring a ton to the table during their limited time on screen like a couple of power arms out of the pen to get a big out in the 7th and 8th.

Add it all up and I cannot WAIT to hear that TV static followed by the sound of angels singing from heaven and this incredible song playing.