Get Your Popcorn Ready: Brittany Matthews (Patrick Mahomes' Wife) Called Out Shane Gillis and Joe Rogan For Talking Shit After Rogan Made A Joke About Divorce.

NY Post - Brittany Matthews and Joe Rogan appear to be publicly beefing.

Matthews, who married Chiefs quarterback Patrick Mahomes in March 2022, tweeted about “grown men talking s–t” after the UFC color commentator called her out in a recent episode of his podcast, “The Joe Rogan Experience.”

Rogan and his guests, Shane Gillis, Mark Normand and Ari Shaffir — who are all stand-up comics, writers and podcasters — were discussing the Mahomes family when Gillis began roasting Matthews for her loud behavior at Chiefs games.

I actually agree with Brittany here.

Grown "ass" men hating on women is pathetic.

But grown men pointing out the glaringly obvious, and comedians making jokes about the obvious on a comedy podcast is not. In fact, it's actually fucking hilarious. 

By now it's pretty apparent that Patrick Mahomes signed a deal with his two devils, his brother and his wife, before this season began that stated they would not and could not post a fucking thing on social media all season. Anything that could be construed as embarrassing, taunting, annoying, obnoxious, attention-starved, et. al. Ever again. 

And those two signed it. 

You know why?

Because, (and I'm speculating here but I think you'll agree with my theory), the ONE stipulation in there was that if the Chiefs won the Super Bowl this season, they could go back to their fucking three-ring circus of humiliating Patrick and their family all they want on social media. 

Mahomes was like the rest of us going into this season. Realistic. He knew his team was banged up, lost some key weapons, and thought his division had drastically improved. (It did not.) 

I'll even go as far as saying that the contract he signed crossed his mind in the 2nd quarter when he pulled up limp and seemed to be hurt. 

I think he was laying face down in the turf, and the thought crossed his mind- "holy fuck. The tide is turning even though we're down. If we come back and win this game I will be subjecting the entire world to Brittany and Jackson again. But I'm out here to win a championship, further build my legacy, and my teammates are depending on me. Does that make me a selfish person? Because the world is also depending on me to save them from the tiktoks. What do I do?"

As we all know he went on to ball in the second half and lead a comeback to secure his second Super Bowl win in 3 tries.

And wouldn't you know it, immediately after doing so, the gates of hell reopened.

Like the scene in Ghostbusters when Zuul and the Keymaster link up and the skies open up, Gozar shows up, and the apocalypse is upon us.

Except in this case, we don't have Peter Venkman and the boys to save us. 

And as much as I fucking love Shane Gillis and Joe Rogan, they stand no chance against these two either. 

I mean look at this. This man just won his second Super Bowl, as well as being named league and SB MVP, then partied his ass off for two weeks straight, and this was his face yesterday.

He looks how my dog looked for a month after I had him neutered. Despondent. Regretful. Questioning life's meaning. Poor guy.

Brittany and Jackson are like two natural disasters combining forces the likes of which planet Earth and civilization have never encountered before. There's no stopping them. It's like if a hurricane and earthquake combined forces and struck at the same time. Coordinated attack. You're done. There's nothing you can do to protect yourself. You can prepare all you want but unless you get out of the way and totally relocate yourself, you're dead. 

That's like Brittany and Jackson. As Stuart Scott said, you can't stop them, you can only hope to contain them. Patrick held them back for a year, and oh what a glorious, and quiet, year it was. But now they're back. And they're making up for lost time.

If the fucking greatest player in the NFL today can't put a muzzle on them for more than 8 months then what are the rest of us supposed to do?

Yah I know Joe Rogan reaches 90 million listeners a week and Shane Gillis is the hottest thing since crotchless panties, but do you really think Jackson Mahomes and Brittany Matthews give a fuck? 

They'll cry martyr all day on social media, like they're the victims, and round up the mobs. 

To hell with the fact Rogan's joke, (key word, joke), was very funny, and dead-on. That shit doesn't matter anymore in this age of "no-context." 

Clip the quote, attach a bombastic headline, and run it to print. Make Matthews look like an innocent bystander and Rogan look like the asshole bully. And around and around we go.

It's kind of like walking up to somebody bigger than you, and poking them over and over, trying to get a reaction out of them. Then, when you inevitably get punched in the mouth, running to the teacher to tell on them.

(sidebar - which reminds me. saw this this weekend and this is nuts.)

My hope in all this is that the media manages to blow this out or proportion, like they do so well, to the point Rogan and Gillis vs. Mahomes and Mahomes becomes the new East Coast West Coast rap wars. We'd hopefully get Rogan and Gillis deciding to go all out and absolutely destroy these two, sending them into the shadow realm, where they're never heard from again.

Here's a tip for Brittany if she doesn't want to get shit-talked by grown-ass men anymore. Don't give them any ammo. Simple as that. There are hundreds of thousands of players' wives in pro-sports and you're the only one people seem to enjoy going after. 

p.s. - my favorite Shane Gillis set