If You Ever Feel Like You're A Massive Failure And Disappointment, Just Remember That The Toronto Maple Leafs Exist
Claus Andersen. Getty Images.Have you ever felt like you're just not good enough? As if you're letting down everybody around you who you love and care about? It's pretty common human nature to let those thoughts and doubts creep into our mind every once in a while. But they're certainly thoughts you want to get rid of as quickly as possible and not dwell on them for too long.
So the next time those thoughts come creeping into your mind, I just want you to remember that a little ol' team named the Toronto Maple Leafs exist. And as long as that team exists, you'll never be the biggest failure or the biggest disappointment. Those sorry sacks of shit already called dibs.
Pain. Shame. Suffering. Disappointment. Almost at a point where the fanbase has reached apathy towards this deplorable group of underachievers.
You have a generational talent in Auston Matthews. They're paying John Tavares $11M per year because he wore Maple Leafs pajamas as a little kid. Mitch Marner is getting paid like he's Patrick Kane. And this team has been able to schedule a vacation in late April every single year since the lockout in '05. 6 straight playoff series losses heading into this year's Stanley Cup Playoffs, and that's only if you count the qualifying round in the 2020 bubble as an actual playoff series. Technically they didn't even qualify for the first round of the playoffs that year, but we'll cut them some slack there. The fact of the matter is that every time this team has to play like their season is on the line, they catastrophically crash and burn. Every. Single. Time.
Could this possibly be the year things are different?
And sure, it's just game 1 of a 7-game series. There's still plenty of time for the Leafs to turn this thing around. But you know that they won't. They got their dicks kicked it at home to start what could and should be a franchise altering series. Either they win this series and maybe there's hope for this group, or they lose in the first round yet again and blow it all up. The fact that this was how they came out tells you everything you need to know about this group. They're not built for this. And also when you've got bozos like Michael Bunting running around like this, you know the leadership in that locker room is absolute dog shit.
Down 4-2 and you think you're going to make an impact on the game by getting tossed for this chicken shit hit? Enjoy the suspension. Guy loves to spend 60 minutes per night bitching to the refs, and then wonders why he gets the reputation he has.
The good news for Toronto fans is that Auston Matthews is about to enter the final year of his contract, and there's not a chance in hell he ends up re-signing with the Leafs. So eventually this team will be at a point where they're not even good enough to get the fanbase's hopes up. Can't be disappointed when you know you're gonna suck.
Leafs Forever.