Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?

I've been trying to do a history-related Snake Draft during Twisted History for the past few weeks... They are easier to research than an actual history topic, and people are not sick of them, even though the idea has been beaten to death.  

Although they aren't the first people to do it, it could be argued I am stealing this idea from Barstool Chicago.  But since that office is stealing Zah and Spider from me, I will neither ask their permission nor beg for their forgiveness.

Last week it was "Historical" Movies and 100s of people felt compelled to mention all those we missed.  Collectively, Twisted History drafted only 25 flicks (5 a piece), but we could've quickly done 10 more each because there is obviously such a large pool of eligible candidates to choose from.

Well, this week's topic presents us with an even bigger pool of candidates because we are drafting Historical Figures We'd Like To Have Dinner With.  The only caveats here are that the people you draft have to be dead, AND their lives had to have some historical significance… So I can't draft my dead Uncle Tony, no matter how awesome I think he might've been.

Romano Cagnoni/RETIRED. Getty Images.

(Rest In Power, King.)

I won't outline the reasoning for all of our picks.  Nobody wants that, and I can feel I am already losing readers.  So I will post the full draft results below and you can figure out who we missed.  

HOWEVER, I will justify my first pick because even though there are MILLIONS of dead dinner-mates to choose from, this guy's choice as my #1 resides on a hill I am willing to die on.

Who else could you choose to break bread with and casually ask him what it was like to lead an infantry in World War I and then a police force in New York City?

Sit next to a guy who survived an assassination that left a bullet lodged in his chest, attended the funeral of Abe Lincoln, and then give away the bride at the wedding of FDR?

In between courses ask your guest about what it was like to scale the Matterhorn and/or what was it like to be the first American to win the Nobel Peace Prize for having negotiated peace in the Russo-Japanese War?

The only negative of inviting this gent to dine is you'd have to sit on his right side because he was blind in his left eye after an injury received during a boxing match in the White House… That injury caused him to switch from boxing to jiu-jitsu.

We'd probably hold the dinner in Keen's Chophouse where he kept a pipe and ate mutton by the pound.

Statesman, soldier, conservationist, naturalist, historian, and writer who served as the 26th president of the United States from 1901 to 1909… All that and the Teddy Bear is named after him.

I think Teddy Roosevelt is easily the #1 pick in a draft of dead guys I'd like to break bread with.

Here's who the other idiots chose…

Obviously, I won, but did we miss the opportunity to discuss what dinner would be like if you shared a table with Hitler, Stalin, Dahmer, Ted Kaczynski, and Jeffrey Epstein?

Take a report.

-Large

Full episode…

TAR

-L