My Lasagna Recipe Is So Good It Will Get You Laid

I got this message in my dm's a couple of weeks ago which was a nice pleasant thing to open up. Much better than the regular "kill yourself" from barstool trolls, or the pics of girls taking fists in places I didn't know were humanly possible from one of the zillion Russian bot accounts on twitter.)

Anyway, a few years ago while home bored out of my skull during lockdown (sidebar- what a wild fucking time that was huh? Do you ever think about telling the next generation who weren't alive for it about what it was like and how dumb we're going to sound?), I cooked like a maniac and documented several of my go-to's on instagram. 

They were kind of a hit and people still ask me about them randomly today. (Not by Chef Donny, who doesn't want to get trounced in his own kitchen of course, but from many more secure people). Mainly about my red sauce from scratch recipe, my stuffed shells, and this lasagna recipe.

Now here's the disclaimer here - I'm not trying to say this recipe is better than your moms, or your nonna's, or your favorite Food Network chef's (Ina Garten for me), or even yours.

I don't think it is and I honestly don't care.

All I am saying is, this is my mom's recipe, and it crushes. 

Everybody I've made it for in my life has raved about it.

Everybody I have passed it on to has raved about it.

And as the DM up above proves, it will get you laid one-out-of-every-nine times you make it. That's my guarantee to you.

Are Giada and Rachel Ray promising you that? Doubt it.

It's not difficult to make, the steps are easy to follow, and it comes out solid as long as you follow them. If you want a surefire way to impress your family over the holidays, or you wanna wow your girlfriend, give this a try. 

** One thing I will say is the better the ingredients you use, the better it will come out ** 

This may not sound like rocket science, but it's crazy how big of a difference this makes.

Meaning, opt for the brand name stuff when you can. Buy fresh, from the deli vs. packaged if possible. Organic grass-fed beef and eggs if possible. 

When I filmed this tutorial I was at a vacation house in Michigan and my only shopping location was a Meijer and didn't have the greatest stuff, but it still came out great using Prince lasagna sheets, and 365 Ricotta. 

Speaking of the ricotta, and this is important, You have to make sure to get PART SKIM ricotta cheese, not whole. It will be way too heavy and cooks like shit. 

Here's the full ingredient list-

Thanks to my guy Benny for taking the time to write all this down.

If you can't get a deli that sells you ground sausage, you can buy the links (hot, and mild/sweet) and just cut the casings with a knife and brown and grind it up in your pot with a wooden spoon/spatula.

Layer the ricotta on thin to start, you can always add more, but its a mess if you put too much on a layer. Spread it evenly using the backside of the spoon or ladle. 

If you like the top layer and edges super crispy, and cheese browned, you can cover the top with tin foil during the cook, and then remove it for the last 10-15 minutes. Or even broil it super quick at the very end before pulling it.

And it's also important to let the lasagna sit for 15-20 minutes after you pull it out of the oven before cutting into it because it will turn to soup and fall apart everywhere. 

(This lasagna also tastes even better reheated the next day)

Here's the video. Enjoy!

p.s. - we got some good news this week. 

Foodbeast - A recent study conducted by “Behavioral & Brain Lab” at Italy’s Free University of Languages and Communication IULM, in collaboration with Unione Italiana Food, has uncovered some interesting things about how humans respond emotionally and neurophysiologically to eating pasta. 

To examine emotional reactions, researchers used similar methods as those employed in lie detectors. They tracked brain activity in 40 food allergy-free subjects aged 25 to 55. The results were enlightening, revealing that eating pasta activates a strong and sustained emotional-cognitive state similar to listening to music or watching sports, even surpassing those.

Pasta and happiness are inseparable according to Professor Vincenzo Russo, founder of the Neuromarketing Behavior & Brain Lab IULM. The taste alone stimulates positive memories and emotions. When consumption habits were analyzed, researchers discovered that individuals also associate eating pasta with spending time with family and friends. 

In the study, 40% of participants consider pasta a comfort food and 76% confirmed that consuming it increases happiness. Additionally, science also supports the theory. It’s proven that complex carbohydrates stimulate endorphins, which help absorb the tryptophan and B vitamins present in pasta. Tryptophan helps regulate mood and B vitamins relax muscles while producing serotonin.

BOOM!