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Fantasy Football Funktown Week 14 - Player WAR Update, The Team You Could Have Picked Up Hungover Sunday Morning, And MORE!

Here is your official best fantasy football players in PPR through 14 weeks according to my wins above replacement model. Quick TL;DR - WAR estimates how many wins acorss a 17-game season your fantasy team gets solely due to a specific player MORE than a replacement-level player at the same position. 

The fantasy football regular season is now over and this is how the cookie crumbled in terms of player value. We still have playoffs to cover that contribute to crowing the best player in the game but let's fire off some takes for where we're at heading into your fantasy yoffs.

Christian McCaffrey - what else is left to say??

I don't really have anything new here except to point out his worst game in PPR was for 13 points. He is the perfect fantasy weapon perhaps ever and this includes Tomlinson. 

Fuck/Mary/Kill (Keenen Allen, JaMarr Chase, Gabe Davis)

Fuck: JaMarr Chase. When this dude get's his thing going it's a wild ride that's a lot of fun. I can't imagine how errotic watching 19 targets go his way earlier this year must have been for those who had the pleasure.

Mary: Kennen Allen. Keenin is Old Reliable. It doesn't matter what clusterfuck is going on with the team around him this dude just goes out and balls every week. Anyone that drafted him as the "safe, unsexy" pick was rewarded for sticking with the man that has never let anyone down pretty much his entire career. 

Kill: Gabe Davis. Gabe is the total opposite of Keenan. He's Keenan Allen in the Upside Down. A heavy favorite for fantasy football Troll of the Year (blog coming soon), you obviously can't mary Davis but if you just fuck him he'll lure you right back into a toxic trap that fools you into thinking he's changed for good. You must put an end to this absolute monster…. 

… 2024 might be the year though!!!

Raschaad White

White wins the "Oh yeah, I guess he's actually been good" award for best performance in an unnoticeable peformance. There he is up towards the top of the charts. A nondescript back in a nondescript market on a nondescript team from a nondescript division. 

Josh Allen / Jalen Hurts are Round 1 picks in 2024

Given how pathetic the quarterback position has been this year and how electric these two quarterbacks have been I'm thinking people finally take my stance on top-ADP QBs and just take both these guys towards the end of Round 1. And they'll be smart to do it.

Alright let's get to the best team you could have picked up hungover Sunday morning. 148 points outta this band of outcasts:

OK - enough fantasizing. Let's look at a team with some players you actually did start…

26 points. As Jamal Adams would say… Yikes. 

What a sad day for Justin Jefferson owners who had to sit and look at their #1 pick on the IR shelf all year until finally - a week before the playoffs - they got to unleash their secret weapon to get hurt after a few plays.

That's it for now. I'm gonna crunch some other Troll of the Year candidates but this is gonna be real hard to beat…