What I Learned In 2023

When I think on what I learned in 2023, prioritizing and saying “no” are at the top of the list. 

Transitioning out of football, running our business with @bussinwtb, and becoming a dad has forced me to constantly reevaluate what my goals & ambitions are. 

Pre-podcasting era, football was my life 24/7/365. It was all I thought about and the only thing I ever wanted to excel at. Even though it is a volatile, day-to-day performance based business, you are able to anticipate what your routine looks like because there is a lot of structure.

Moving into the media/entertainment world, entrepreneurship, and being a new father - its gone from having all of that structure provided to me, to being the one creating that structure for myself. And I am someone that If I don’t feel in control I feel aimless, which stresses me the fuck out.

“Control your ambitions, or your ambitions will control you.”

Identifying Bussin’, Barstool, my family, and my health as where I want my ambitions to be has helped me prioritize where I want my focus to be. 

• I want to be at home more now that I have my little family.
• I want to be a better leader/partner with my Bussin’ team.
• I want to pour into what I love doing on the content side.
• I want to improve my health.

And, in my opinion, I can afford to pour into each of these without sacrificing one for the other. The key, again, is: controlling my ambitions and prioritizing. If I don’t - greed, FOMO, and that chase for “more” that nobody ever catches will control me; and out of those four priorities, my family and health would be the two that would take a backseat. 

That is where my learning curve with saying “no” has been very beneficial for me. 

Vanessa Patrick, the author of "The Power Of Saying No", helped me understand that saying “no” to one thing meant you’re saying yes to other things. With Bussin’ With The Boys, we are in a position to where we can pretty much do whatever we want, whenever we want. It’s obviously fucking awesome but again, if I don’t keep myself in check I would be saying yes to everything and trying to be everywhere. 

Yes, I want to grow and ascend as much as possible, but at the same time what is “enough?” Because the more I say “yes” to opportunities, the more I say “no” to being at home for those moments with my wife and watching Rue grow up. I can always say “yeah, but I’m sacrificing now so we can have this certain life later.” But what about my kid only being 21 months old this one time in her life? Sure, she probably won’t remember her first birthday party, her dad going to her first ballet class, hitting the local spots on weekends.. but those are memories that will mean everything to me when I’m going full dad-mode to a youngster, and stressing to him the importance of enjoying every moment as I hold back tears and the urge to show him old photos like he’ll understand. This younger generation will never fucking understand.

Prioritizing and saying “no” has helped guide my clarity on what I’m looking for. And as my priorities and goals continue to shift I feel like I know the questions to ask myself when pivoting another direction. It also helps me deal with my FOMO when turning down fun trips with the boys. 

God I hate missing those.. 

But hey - that’s the price you pay when you don’t pull out. 

Thank you for your time.