Live EventJon Gruden and Dave Portnoy Join Max and PFT For Eagles-CommandersWatch Now

Chuck Schumer Is Trying To Ban Zyns

Look, I like to think I am a rational person that tries to take unbiased views of controversial topics and policy decisions, but why the fuck is only one side of the government trying to take away and go after the things I like. 

I like ZYN. If it wasn't for ZYN, I would be doing way more damage to my gums or lungs through other nicotine administration devices. I had the idea for Zyn in my brain in high school when I was trying to figure out a way we could administer nicotine without the cancer, short-term damage, or killing my wind when I was packing dips on the sideline of Lacrosse or Football games (after being taken out while blowing the other team out). Zyn was the greatest invention of all time; it was straight nicotine and flavoring in a pouch that was way less invasive than long-cut dip, cigarettes, tobacco, or even VAPE. Vape is taking 22-year-olds lungs and being produced in Chinese factories that are probably putting industrial waste in them in order to destroy America. They even test vapes by mouth!

I am just saying, why are these old motherfuckers still in office. As anyone with a brain would know, the Zyn is the greatest thing to happen to nicotine addicts since they found out cigarettes are bad for you. Why the hell is this guy try to ban Zyn?! BEFORE LONG CUT. I COULD SEE THE ARGUMENT FOR LONG CUT. NOT FOR ZYN. I just want to get alil nicotine buzz. Its one of the only things that make me productive. You know how many adults who no longer receive ADHD meds (especially since they nerfed them) depend on ZYN? Schumer deal with some of the bigger issues in the country and leave Zyn Alone.