Live EventJersey Jerry Sweats Out Pittsburgh vs Cleveland with Pardon My Take | Barstool Gambling CaveWatch Now

The Lunatic My Pillow Guy Has The Worst Case of Butthole Eyes In History

Goodness gracious alive. Look at them things. Now, some people are saying this picture is doctored but I dunno. I'm not a Photoshop expert but I'm gonna lean towards real. Mike Lindell looks like he's never had a glass of water. He looks like he's been shitting his brains out for fucking months. He looks like he hasn't had a good night's rest in over a decade which is disappointing being that he's the My Pillow Guy. If he can't sleep, who can?

But, being tired comes with the job when you are trying to prove, for the 4th year, that the past election was stolen. Every day you go out there and announce that you have the proof and that it's coming soon. Every day you stump and stump and stump to the point of exhaustion. That'll take a toll on you. 

Now, let's talk about butthole eyes. Even though I coined the term, we must go over what the term means again. 

The phrase "butthole eyes" is a colloquialism used to describe someone whose eyes appear small, dark, or perhaps deeply set, reminiscent of the appearance of the anus. It's quite a derogatory term, often used humorously but with the intention to insult or mock someone's appearance.

ChatGBT goes on to describe the origins of the term by saying that:

Uncle Chaps, a blogger and personality associated with Barstool Sports, did indeed use the phrase "butthole eyes" to describe Pete Davidson, a comedian and actor known for his appearances on Saturday Night Live and other media ventures.

It's true. I did. 

So, because I coined the term, it's only appropriate that I can crown the greatest or worst, depending on how you look at it, of all time. Congrats to the My Pillow Guy. Kinda.