Kelly Stafford Apologizes to Joe Cox for Convincing the World He's the Backup QB She Hooked Up With at Georgia to Make Matthew Jealous

I take a back seat to few, if any, men when it comes to my respect and admiration for Kelly Stafford. If you're the kind of gentleman who appreciates a strong-minded, independent, outspoken women, you'll find none better. If you're a public figure who's had to take more than your share of slings and arrows in your career, you couldn't find a more ideal spouse to have your back. She is doing pioneering work in the field of discovering fucks to not give. And was born to be in front of a microphone. 

All that said, having no filter will come with certain ramifications. Like for instance, if you tell a funny story about making your future husband jealous by boning his backup quarterback in college:

... you have to expect there will be real world consequences. Such as everyone immediately going to old Georgia Bulldogs rosters to suss out who was the bad boy fortunate enough to ride the F-Train with his starter's girlfriend. And you have to expect they're going finger Joe Cox as the one who ... um, fingered you. 

Which might be fine if Cox was single. It can't be the worst thing for a fella's social life to have everyone suddenly assuming you're the hypotenuse to the Stafford's old love triangle. Not only that, but a reputation as the bad boy that good girls turn to when they want to get their good boy's attention can't hurt your prospects with the ladies any. Even if it's not true. Perception is reality as you go through life adding to your body count. 

The problem is, Cox is neither single nor trying to put more trophies on his wall. Which apparently made this whole thing pretty awkward in the Cox home. So Stafford has had to backpedal faster than any UGA All American defensive back ever did:

“To this beautiful fam…I’m sorry for the media storm that happened last week that made its way into your lives. You had ZERO involvement in what I spoke about and in fact it was was ya’lls relationship in college that I looked up to and wanted for me and Matthew. You were the couple that everyone things Matthew and I was.. y'all wer the UGA QB and cheerlader that met and never let go. I love y'all."

So there you have it. A wonderfully sincere apology. Beautifully expressed. Sprinkled with just the right amount of "y'all" to make it authentically Georgian. Hopefully it'll be received in the same spirit with which it was given. 

But the major lesson to be learned here is not to avoid telling stories about who you boned in college. It's just that you need to be specific. Name names. Be out with it. Somewhere out there is a gentleman who went to the mountaintop with his starting quarterback's honey while he was below even Cox on the Bulldog's depth chart. He deserves to have this accomplishment recognized. He's earned his 15 minutes of fame. He ought to have the world know he's the sort of rebel who plays by his own rules that hot, popular coeds like a young Kelly Stafford couldn't resist. That troubled loner she tried to fix with one night of commitment-free cheating on her future husband. 

So let's hear it, Mrs. Stafford. Give this man his second moment of glory. Or else the internet will just keep taking wild guesses and ruining other marriages until you do.