The New Movie Starring Robbie Williams As A Monkey Playing Himself Is A COLOSSAL Box Office Bomb

'Better Man' - the new Robbie Williams biopic, starring the former 'Take That' star playing himself (but as a CGI monkey) - doesn't seem to be finding its audience quite like expected here in America.

Haven't heard of the movie OR Robbie Williams? You're not alone, as the movie has made only $96,379 in the States - and just $3.5 million worldwide on a budget of well over a hundred and ten million. 

It's a shame because by all accounts, the movie is pretty damn good, but nobody cares!

Robbie Williams never made it big here, but was absolutely MASSIVE internationally in the late 90s/early 2000s. He was an original member of the hugely popular boy band 'Take That', and then exploded even further into the zeitgeist when he broke off from the group and went solo. Robbie Williams was essentially Harry Styles before Harry Styles, or Justin Timberlake before Justin Timberlake. He had a few smash hits you may know like 'Angels' or 'Feel' (not for me), got into plenty of trouble/hijinks over the years, and famously broke the Oasis Knebworth record; while they sold out two-nights in 1996, he sold out three-nights in 2003.

As an Oasis fan myself, I've always kept Robbie Williams at a steady distance, as they didn't have the cushiest relationship - and I'd be lying if I said I didn't consider this movie's failure as small win. Sure, he broke their attendance record once upon a time - but we won the war, god dammit. 

I will admit, though….after watching a bootleg clip of the actors portraying the Gallagher brothers in 'Better Man' - I think they actually kinda nailed it. Liam passes the test, and Noel's quick "Fuck off, cunt." is spot on.

Oh - and to address the elephant monkey in the room, they apparently decided to have Robbie Williams play himself as a CHIMPANZEE instead of a human because "there's nothing cool about a monkey doing drugs" and they didn't want to further glorify the rockstar lifestyle. It seems a bit ridiculous, but so did the concept behind the Lego Pharrell biopic, which was also supposedly great! Again - allegedly it works in the context of the movie!

I'll definitely give 'Better Man' a watch when it hits streaming, and I'm looking forward to it - but simply can't believe the miscalculation the studio made by putting over a hundred million dollars into this thing.

P.S. Fuck it - here's Oasis at Knebworth….