New Money Making Scheme Just Dropped: Employee Wins $30k Lawsuit After Co-Worker Compared Her to Darth Vader, Ruining Her Reputation Beyond Repair

The Guardian – Comparing someone at work to the Star Wars villain Darth Vader is “insulting” and “upsetting”, an employment tribunal has ruled.

A judge concluded that being told you have the same personality type as the infamous sci-fi baddie is a workplace “detriment” – a legal term meaning harm or negative impact experienced by a person.

“Darth Vader is a legendary villain of the Star Wars series, and being aligned with his personality is insulting,” the employment judge Kathryn Ramsden said.

The tribunal’s ruling came in the case of an NHS blood donation worker Lorna Rooke, who has won almost £30,000 after her co-worker took a Star Wars-themed psychological test on her behalf and told colleagues Rooke fell into the Sith Lord’s category.

Rooke won her case for detriment after a protected disclosure but lost claims for unfair dismissal, disability discrimination, and failure to make reasonable adjustments. She was awarded £28,989.61 in compensation.

Hat tip to Lorna Rooke for creating a $32,920 (converted to USD) lawsuit out of thin air. I'm a little unclear exactly where that money is coming from. I'm assuming it falls on her employer, the National Health Service. A publicly funded healthcare system in the UK. So maybe not the most ethical group to hit with a frivolous lawsuit. But I also can't imagine they're sweating $30,000 too much. Considering Lorna had worked there since 2003, to find a way to walk out of there with a little extra bonus after 20+ years of service seems fair enough. 

I'm afraid Lorna misplayed her hand though. If you come to learn that your co-workers perceive you as the Darth Vader of the office, that means they fear you. That means you hold power over them. Sure a $30k check is fun. And maybe she wanted to quit her job anyways. But if you're the Darth Vader of the office, there's no telling what you could convince your co-workers to do for you. If the office Darth Vader walks up to her superior and asks for a $30k raise, or even demands an early $30k Christmas bonus, they'll probably just give it to her. You don't just up and leave a place that you're the Darth Vader of. Becoming the Darth Vader of where you work is literally the goal.

But the obvious next question is, if being compared to Darth Vader by a co-worker nets you roughly $30k, what is the going rate for other "undesirable" comparisons?

Probably something like that. If only I hadn't signed the "I'm not allowed to get offended" contract when I started with Barstool, then I might have a case for a little payout of my own. My co-workers are constantly comparing me to serial killers. I get Richard Ramirez all the time. 

I forgot to include a serial killer on my lawsuit payout chart, but I'm thinking Richard Ramirez would fall somewhere in the Bill Cosby-King Joffrey range. 

Either way, I'll have to keep this move in my bag chasing tickler file on the off-chance I'm not blogging for Barstool Sports into retirement age. And for anybody else out there looking to quit their job, if you can bait your co-workers into comparing you to a super villain, maybe you can grab a little something extra on the way out the door yourself. Apparently there's money in that. At least if you're in London.