Oh Well That's Just Great! Now The Shrimp Is Radioactive
Ildar Imashev. Getty Images.A couple weeks ago there was a story out there about a radioactive wasps nest being found in South Carolina. A wasps nest that tested for 10x the safe amount of radioactive exposure, yet no wasps were found in the nests. Which means these nuked up murder flies could be buzzing around anywhere right now.
So radioactive wasps currently have control of the air. But at least the land and sea are both safe. 2 out of 3 ain't bad. We can live with those odds. Or so we thought….
Cesium-137 is a byproduct of nuclear fission. Probably not the best thing that you'd want to end up ingesting. And to think that one day the world found out how to harness nuclear power to make weapons, and now decades later it has resulted in millions of radioactive shrimp.
Unless you want to become a mutant, that means you've already ate your last shrimp taco of the summer. That's completely and utterly devastating. The summer was invented for shrimp tacos with a cilantro-lime crema sauce drizzled over top. We still have another week or so to squeeze out of the summer, but now the shrimp are nuclear. You didn't even get a chance to say a proper goodbye to shrimp tacos. No more coconut shrimp. No shrimp scampi. No shrimp and grits. No shrimp fried rice.
Wasps and shrimp. The air and sea are now overtaken by monsters mutated by nuclear fallout. All that's left now is to find out there's a pack of radioactive grizzly bears roaming around somewhere. We've seen enough movies to know exactly how this is going to go.
Sidenote: What do you even do if you just dummied a bag of this shrimp before you saw anything about the recall? Cesium 137 has a half-life of 30 years. Do you just wait it out and see if you turn into the Hulk at any point over the the next few decades?