Harrison Bader Hooked Up The Little Kid Who Got Home Run Ball Snatched Away From Him By A Wild Karen With The Signed Bat (PLUS: Bonus Angles Of Philly Karen)
Isaac Newton said that every action has an equal, and opposite reaction.
So when some this knockoff Megan Rapinoe decided to be the worst person on the planet by storming over to this father who just snagged a home run ball for his son on his birthday, and demanding that they give the ball to her because it was hit in her direction? Well the universe shifted towards evil for a moment. That Subaru Outback black magic was swirling in the air, and the universe knew that it needed to balance itself back out. So if Karen Rapinoe was going to go out of her way to ruin this little boy's night, the universe was going to make sure that his year was made.
If this little kid couldn't have the ball that Harrison Bader roped out of LoanDepot Park, then Harrison Bader was going to make sure he got to leave with the bat, and a signature to boot.
The home run ball would have been cool and everything, but there was nothing historic about that home run. Nothing super memorable about it. You'd hold onto that home run ball for a few years, but you'd forget about it at some point. It would go up in the attic and never ben heard from again.
But a signed bat from Harrison Bader after the Phillies personally brought you down towards the clubhouse for the VIP treatment? Getting to bring your whole family down there with you, and have some 1-on-1 time with your new favorite player? That's a story for life, and that's a bat that gets kept on display for the rest of time. Eventually this little fella is gonna move out of his parents house and into an apartment of his own. You know damn well that the signed Harrison Bader bat is going to be one of the first things he packs up for that move.
What a night for this little dude. And what a night for society, actually. It's so great to see nature finally starting to heal. According to reports on the ground, Philly Karen was boo'd out of the stadium. As she should be for that behavior. And we also got the money shot angle. One of those times that you're actually glad there are a bunch of Gen Z's at a baseball game just filming everything all the time instead of actually watching the game.
Every single way that you thought that interaction would have went? Every single detail from what was said, to the pitch of the voice, to the jaw dropping amount of entitlement? Yeah, this angle just goes ahead and confirms it all.
Good news is that the Phillies, and Harrison Bader, have righted this wrong. They've set the course back on the right track, and have defeated any evil haze that would be looming over the rest of this season. And shoutout to the Marlins, who also hooked this kid up with a little goodie bag. Nothing can bring two division opponents together quite like the worst woman ever.