The Long Walk Is Excellent, The Conjuring: Last Rites Is Barely Fine & Other Reviews

The Long Walk is, by far, the highlight of this week's reviews but I also have mixed-to-bad reviews in this blog for The Conjuring: Last Rites, The Roses and Light Of The World. If you're looking for something to see this week, the 2nd best movie of the year (Weapons), 3rd best (Caught Stealing) and 4th best (The Long Walk) are all in theaters.
The Long Walk manages to be equally optimistic and pessimistic about humanity. This only works if you have a strong screenplay and very good actors delivering the message. Luckily, this movie has all of those things and winds up being one of the better movies I’ve seen this year.
Cooper Hoffman and David Jonsson are exceptional in the movie with a very strong cast of some really talented young actors. The exception here is Mark Hamill who is woefully miscast.
I’ve loved this book for over 30 years and have been waiting for it to become a movie. I was concerned a movie about people walking might not work on the big screen but director Francis Lawrence did as good a job telling this story as someone could. It’s about friendship, desperation, why we live and what we do to each other. That’s a lot to put on the screen and The Long Walk pulls it off.
The Long Walk: A-
Movies either exist in the deep part of the pool or the shallow end. The ones that are near the diving board give you plenty to think about and challenge how we look at the world. The Conjuring: Last Rites barely has water that goes above your knees.
This is the kind of movie that you won’t think about again in a week or two. But, it’s mildly entertaining and I didn’t regret the time I spent watching it. For those reasons, I give this the mildest of recommendations.
If you love this franchise, then go see Conjuring: Last Rites. It has moderately fine performances with moderately fine scares.
But, there are much better options that tell similar stories. Skip this and go watch the original Poltergeist. It’s 40 years old but is much more relatable and terrifying than anything in this movie.
The Conjuring: Last Rites: C+
The Roses starts off as sitcom-level quality for the first 50 or so minutes. The pacing is slow and the jokes are stale. But in the last 40 minutes, when the gloves come off, this is a funny and unusual movie. Because of that, I think I have to recommend this.
It feels like there are guardrails up for so much of this movie. Because of that, you don’t really get to see Benedict Cumberbatch and Olivia Colman really act. Why hire two such talented actors if you are going to have such a generic movie for so long?
The craziest thing is the very good (and nasty) last act of this feels rushed. This could have been so much more of the movie. The other thing is I never really believed Cumberbatch and Colman loved each other but I did believe it when they hated each other.
The supporting cast does no one any favors. Andy Samberg is neutered and Kate McKinnon is acting like she’s in an especially bad SNL sketch about something entirely different than this movie.
If you can get past most of this movie, the ending does make it worth it. But that might be asking too much.
The Roses: C+
Light Of The World tells the story of Jesus with some of the worst animation you’ll see on the big screen this century. It’s the kind of cartoon where the characters move but nothing in the background does. Somehow, that’s not the laziest thing about this movie.
That falls on the character of the apostle John, who is drawn (and behaves) like a child, yet sometimes is treated like an adult at times. It’s not explained because the script doesn’t seem to care.
There’s been a bunch of Jesus-related movies to hit theaters this year. The best of this has been The Chosen, which was an Amazon Prime TV season broken up into a three parts for the big screen. That was made with care. It’s all telling the same story but that proved there can be a new way to tell it.
This just seemed lazy and half-ass to me. I have to imagine there is a better way to get kids to care about religion than a cartoon that looks like it was made in 1983.
Light Of The World: D
2025
1)Sinners
2)Weapons
3)Caught Stealing
4)THE LONG WALK
5)Presence
6)The Life Of Chuck
7)Black Bag
8)The Ballad Of Wallis Island
9)Warfare
10)Friendship
11)Superman
12)Mission Impossible 8
13)28 Years Later
14)Novocaine
15)Fantastic Four
16)The Naked Gun
17)Final Destination 6
18)The Amateur
19)Drop
20)Dangerous Animals
21)Together
22)Death Of A Unicorn
23)The Accountant 2
24)The Damned
25)One Of Them Days
26)Materialists
27)Lilo & Stitch
28)Paddington 3
29)Thunderbolts
30)F1
31)Clown In A Cornfield
32)Bring Her Back
33)Hell Of A Summer
34)Karate Kid 6
35)Fight Or Flight
36)Valiant One
37)Sketch
38)THE ROSES
39)How To Train Your Dragon
40)Elio
41)Rule Breakers
42)Heart Eyes
43)THE CONJURING: LAST RITES
44)Mickey17
45)The Surfer
46)Relay
47)Last Breath
48)Flight Risk
49)Minecraft
50)Den Of Thieves 2
51)Dogman
52)Companion
53)Eddington
54)Jurassic World Rebirth
55)KPop Demon Hunters
56)The Toxic Avenger
57)Ballerina
58)A Working Man
59)The Last Rodeo
60)Shadow Force
61)The Alto Knights
62)Honey Don’t
63)The Bad Guys 2
64)The Penguin Lessons
65)The Chosen Part 2
66)Looney Tunes
67)Opus
68)M3GAN 2
69)Becoming Led Zeppelin
70)Captain America: BNW
71)I Know What You Did Last Summer
72)Until Dawn
73)Ne Zha 2
74)The Chosen Part 1
75)Riff Raff
76)The Home
77)Freakier Friday
78)Inheritance
79)Nobody 2
80)The Chosen Part 3
81)The Wedding Banquet
82)Smurfs
83)The Legend Of Ochi
84)Night Of The Zoopocalypse
85)The Phoenician Scheme
86)Sneaks
87)Ash
88)Jujutsu Kaisen
89)The King Of Kings
90)The Friend
91)Dan Da Dan 2
92)LIGHT OF THE WORLD
93)Snow White
94)The Unbreakable Boy
95)Brave The Dark
96)Wolf Man
97)Hurry Up Tomorrow
98)The Monkey
99)Love Hurts
100)The Last Supper
101)Woman In The Yard
102)Bride Hard
103)Juliet & Romeo
104)In The Lost Lands