"NFL Week 1 In Emojis" Is The Most Offensive Thing ESPN Has Done In The Last 7 Months

I could deal with a lot of shit from the “worldwide leader.” I dealt with false reports and obvious smear campaigns run at the behest of Roger Goodell. But a man has to have a line. A man must have a point where he stomps his foot and says, NO MORE. There’s the line, back there, we just crossed it. If I wanted to have a 13 year old girl explain to me what happened in the NFL this weekend, then I’d go ask one. I have a hard enough time listening to most of the analysts on your channel, handing a segment off to this gal with her “BLOOP!” noises and fucking smiley faces is too much to bear.

And, I hate to go all misogynistic on you, but if you’re gonna do this segment then the chick has to be a 10. I’m sorry. I know it’s not fair, but I didn’t make the rules. If a guy is gonna put up with the bullshit antics of younger women then she has to be smoking hot, ask any rich guy with a second wife.