Hey Man You Got A Sword Stuck Up Your Butt, Maybe Don't Try To Perform Surgery On Yourself

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Mirror- A man who apparently thought he had haemorrhoids was rushed to hospital with a sword up his bum after trying some bizarre home surgery. He told medics that he was initially too embarrassed to just turn up for treatment for the condition on his bottom. But he ended up on the local news as he allowed cameras in to the treatment room as a warning to others. He told doctors that he wanted to remove his own piles and tried to do so with a miniature, but razor sharp sword. It didn’t go well, pretty much thanks to the bizarre position he needed to be in to reach around and slice them off. Unfortunately he slipped and the blade shot up his back passage. And if that wasn’t strange enough – it turns out he never had haemorrhoids in the first place.

 

 

 

As a person living with no health insurance there’s one thing I can relate to and that’s do-it-yourself home medical care. I’ve pretty much decided that, “I’ll just let it run it’s course” is my best option for any illness I might have. Or if I drink enough water whatever is wrong with me will just flush it out of my system. It’s worked out so far. I trust that my body will attack defeat any illness I happen to come across. We’ll see what happens when I get cancer and I try to flush it out by drinking 20 gallons of water. It should be fine.  This guy here though is a tad more aggressive with his DIY home medical care.  He saw that he had hemorrhoids and didn’t wanna make the trip to the hospital. So what do you do?  You obviously pull out a giant sword and try to slice them off yourself. Duh. I don’t know anything about hemorrhoids but I’m not sure which is worse. Hemorrhoids or a bunch of open knife woulds from the hemorrhoids you cut off. I’ll tell you what’s worse than both, having the knife slip up into your butthole.  Now you’ve got hemorrhoids, knife wounds and a sword up your butt. That’s what we like to call a bad day.

 

Oh wait

 

Plot twist

 

And if that wasn’t strange enough – it turns out he never had haemorrhoids in the first place.