Vin Scully's Lesson About Fish And Sharks During The Dodgers And Rays Game Yesterday Was Electric
I almost didn’t want to share this, because I felt like it was only going to incite the “baseball is so boring that you can give lessons about fish and sharks during the game broadcasts” crowd, but fuck them. They don’t deserve you, Vin. This was ELECTRIC. I’m a few years removed from college now, and where else am I going to get knowledge like this? Nowhere. Knowledge is power, and I feel like I could bench press a house right now because of Vin Scully. If somebody asked me how long devil rays have been around for, I would not have guessed 20-25 million years. I would’ve been off by SEVERAL million years. I also had no idea there were more than 360 species of sharks. Thought we were just working with the standard great white, hammerhead, whale shark, blue shark, thrasher shark, tiger shark, bull shark and sand shark.
And there’s no doubt in my mind that Portnoy is now going to refer to himself as the manta ray of Barstool, because they have the biggest brains of all 32,000 species of fish. Can see that one coming from a mile away. I bet he doesn’t know that there’s a such thing as a bignose shark, and that’s probably a little more suitable. But I can easily see him putting his office in the basement of the new Barstool headquarters with a bunch of space heaters in there, because manta rays are “deep divers to keep their large brains warm,” and that they need to “keep their brains much warmer than most fish,” AKA everyone else in the Barstool office.