Relive One Of The Best Days In Barstool History...Falcon The Balloon Boy Seemingly Floats Away Into The Atmosphere
A day that will live in infamy…the most commented-on blog in the history of Barstool New York back when the Bash Brothers were running the show…a day long saga of Falcon the Balloon Boy being let loose into the atmosphere…or was he?
KFC October 15th, 2009
FORT COLLINS, Colo. — A 6-year-old boy climbed into a hot-air balloon aircraft and floated away Thursday, forcing officials to scramble to figure out how to rescue the boy. Larimer County sheriff’s spokeswoman Eloise Campanella says the device, which is shaped like a flying saucer, has the potential to rise to 10,000 feet. Sheriff’s officials last saw the device floating south of Milliken, which is about 40 miles north of Denver. Campanella says the 6-year-old climbed into the access door and was in the airborne device. FAA spokesman Mike Fergus says the agency has been notified and it was unclear whether traffic controllers had picked it up on radar.
Here’s a question for you – how the fuck are they gonna get that kid down? Its 7,ooo fuckin feet in the air. Only logical course of action is to fly another hot air balloon along side it and walk across a makeshift bridge to the basket that little fucker is hang out in. Apparently this little dude is going 25 mph! He’s definitely gonna die.
I think I’m ready to declare hot air balloons the single most impractical thing on the planet earth. I mean they are flat out absurd. 200% of the time they end up stuck in power lines. The only thing they are good for is that they are a LOCK to end up on those “World’s Craziest Shit Caught On Tape” shows. That, and those speed boats that flip over like 59 times and shred apart.
UPDATE – I’m watching this shit on CNN, right now. This kid is FUCKING SOARING. This is 3,000% my favorite disaster in a long time, provided this kid doesn’t die. And his name is fuckin FALCON. You can’t make this shit up.
2nd Update – The boy’s family, The Heene’s, are storm chasers. They were on Wife Swap, and him and his brothers have made this BAD ASS music video.
I seriously pray to God this kid survives. Because clearly he KILLS IT.
Final update: