Dangle Days Weekend Hockey Recap: Auston Matthews Does Auston Matthews Things
Here’s a little fun fact for all you boys and girls at home. Auston Matthews,,,,, is a rookie. And at just 19-years-old, the kid already has the strength and skill to pull this move off while getting hooked down.
AND 1!!!! This isn’t on the same level as the Alex Ovechkin back goal his rookie season. But it’s similar in a sense where this is a kid asserting his dominance in the league right away. You can hit him, you can hook him, you can do whatever you think you can do to slow him down. But none of it is going to work and he’s still going to stuff that puck down your throat. What a beauty.
Now We Go From One American Hero To Another…
Good. God. Almighty. I don’t even know what I’m more impressed with. Kane assaulting somebody in Buffalo by demoralizing Lehner like that. Or the pass from Panarin. Both are works of art.
Again, that’s assault brotha. You just can’t do that to another man. And here’s a free tip to the Buffalo Sabres. Maybe think about playing defense on that 88 guy. He’s pretty okay at doing hockey. I know that’s a wild and wacky concept to comprehend but if you don’t play D on that guy, well then this is going to happen 11 times out of 10. I still think the pass from Panarin was more impressive though. Everything about this goal was unfair.
Jonathan Drouin Putting On A One-Man Show
Now I get that this comes against the Avalanche which makes it only half as impressive as it appears to be. But still, what a statement shift from Jonathan Drouin. On the forecheck, works the puck deep, wins the battle in the corner, gets himself set up in the neutral zone, circles the offensive zone, dangles, dangles, has a magnet on his stick for the puck and it’s in the back of the net. That’s 40 full seconds of pure domination from Jonathan Drouin. Ya gotta think that Stevie Y wakes up every morning and thanks the Hockey Gods that he didn’t pull the trigger on trading Drouin last year during that whole fiasco.
Throw Some Mustard On Petr Mrazek’s Skull Because His Mind Is In A Pretzel After This Kuzy Move
Are you going to get blasted in the ass by Kuznetsov going between his legs or are you going to get blasted in the ass when he fakes the tweener and smokes you with his backhand? No matter what, it’s going to be one big giant ass blast when you have to face Evgeny Kuznetsov in the shootout. Prayers go out to Mrazek after this one. Poor guy never even stood a chance. This is the kind of move that gives you PTSD.
Speaking Of Going Between The Legs…
Zach Hamill played 20 games in the NHL with the Boston Bruins but was never able to grab himself that first career NHL goal. That’s irrelevant now, however, after this beauty while playing in the Tier 2 Swedish league. The Dangle Force is strong in this one.
So Smooth I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter
I’m not entirely sure where this goal comes from but it looks like it’s Minnesota High School hockey. And with the Minnesota State High School Hockey tournament coming up in a few short weeks, this is just a little taste of what you can expect to see out there from the young danglers. Just wish there was a little more lettuce in this clip.
Lax Goal(s) Of The Week
Got a toss up here this week so we’ll just highlight a field goal of the week and a box goal of the week. Starting off, of course, with the Joel Tinney fake-flip heard ’round the world against Loyola in overtime.
Here’s the full blog on that goal from Saturday. Long story short, Joel Tinney is a fucking stud. And for the box goal of the week, that honor goes to Dan Dawson for this 1-handed BTB gem.
Why need an off-hand when you can just snipe away with one? Sick sick sick sick sick.
And that wraps up this edition of Dangle Days. Thanks a lot for stopping by and have yourselves a week. Stay saucy, my friends.