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104-Year-Old Lady Says The Key To Being So Old Is Drinking Diet Coke Everyday

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GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Theresa Rowley has been a resident at a Michigan retirement community for the last 15 years. She moved into Sentinel Pointe Retirement Community in Grand Rapids, Mich., when she was 89. On Monday, she turned 104. “I’m surprised that I’m 104,” said Rowley on Tuesday. It just doesn’t seem like I should be that old.” When asked when she and her family moved to Grand Rapids, Rowley couldn’t remember the exact year, only saying that she was born in Illinois in 1914, then moved to North Dakota before eventually coming to Michigan. “When I was 100, I thought I’d never be 104; I thought I’d pass away by that time but it just didn’t happen,” Rowley said. “Then I turn 101, and nothing happens. “Here I am 104, and still nothing happens.” Maybe the reason why nothing has happened is because of her daily intake of her favorite beverage — Diet Coke.

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Trump bout to live FOREVER if Diet coke really is the key to living forever. Word on the street is that Donnie T drinks 12 cans of life juice a day. He’s good.

These articles always make me chuckle. Countless times we’ve heard things like, “This old-as-fuck person drinks/eats (enter unhealthy food or drink) every single day and they’ve managed to out live all of their friends! How fun!” It’s usually chocolate or beer or pork grinds or heroin. Always something super unhealthy. I guarantee this is gonna motivate people to drink one thousand Diet Cokes a day. Or worse, it’s going to encourage people who already drink one thousand Diet Cokes a day to keep doing it. This is their “told ya!” moment. I’m not a doctor but I’m gonna advise against doing that. Every person is different and every body is different. If I drank a bunch of Diet Cokes every day I’d be dead in two months. My body can’t handle that. It just so happens that Theresa (of course, Theresa with an h) Rowley’s body can.

This was my favorite quote from the article by far

“I’m surprised that I’m 104,” said Rowley on Tuesday.

That’s precisely how she should feel. That’s how anyone who lives to be 100+ years old should feel. You should wake up everyone morning like, “Holy shit. What am I still doing here? This is shocking.” She didn’t mean it in a negative or a positive way. She doesn’t necessarily want to still be alive or be dead. She’s simply stating a fact. It’s shocking to live for 104 years.