DeMarcus Lawrence Said He Left The Cowboys Because You Can't Win A Super Bowl There And Micah Parsons Is MAD ONLINE About It

Oh my god I love this interaction. I love DeMarcus Lawrence openly admitting you cannot win a Super Bowl in Dallas, and I especially love Micah Parsons losing his shit over it only for Tank to come over the top and basically say less time on Twitter, more time in the film room and maybe I'd still be there. Just a perfection interaction if you're me. Watching the Cowboys implode, watching former Cowboys say Dallas is a black hole for success, all of it. 

And it's obviously true. The NFL is impossible enough to win in, it's nearly impossible when your owner/GM is a 95 year old looney tune who at any given time is s slight breeze away from shitting his pants. Tank Lawrence is 100% right about everything he is saying.

And the cherry on top? Chauncey Golston chiming in. 

Why is this the cherry, you ask? Because Chauncey Golston literally JUST LEFT THE COWBOYS AND SIGNED WITH THE IN-DIVISION GIANTS!!!!! Brotherhood over EVERYTHING (besides money, of course!). 

I love that the Cowboys are a complete mess. I love that we have Josh Harris and Adam Peters and shouldn't have to worry about being the dramatic off the field shmashmortion of a franchise any longer. It's great to be us, it's awful to be a Cowboys fan. What a time. HTTC.

Hilarious update: Cowboys players are just signing on to cry publicly. Wake up ding dongs. You'll never win as long as Jerry Jones is running your team. 

Wahhhhhhhhhhhhh. Lol. I'm so happy watching this right now.