Karl Malone is no Arnold Schwarzenegger
With Father's Day rapidly approaching, this week's Twisted History is all about bastards, and I highlight 2 celebrity bastard dads in particular.
QUICKLY- Arnold made lemonade with the child he had with his longtime housekeeper behind Maria Shriver's back...

… while it took the Mailman decades before he recognized the product of the statutory rape he committed when he was 20 years old.
(Fuck you.)
On top of that, I touch on some of history's most famous bastards, such as Alexander Hamilton, Confucius, and William I (AKA William The Bastard)… And then we touch on Mindy Kalling, Linda Evangelista, Oprah, Larry Bird, and a SHITLOAD of athletes who simply cannot stop having unprotected sex with women that aren't married to.
And, even though I don't think I am particularly handsome, Twisted History is now available as a video also… I attached it above.
Take a report.
-Large
Twisted History
25 videos

1950: The Golden Age of Twisted History
2
A List Of The Must Watch Gene Hackman Movies
3
How To Make An Irish Cream
4
I Got My Ass Kicked By A Professional Sumo Wrestler
5
Apparently, Frank The Tank Does More Than Just Walk
6
How To Make An Irish Man Cream
7
Are you like me?... Fat and/or drunk? Well, here's your drink for Thanksgiving!
8
How To Make An Irish Cream
9"There were bodies in the trees!"
10The Deadliest Movie Never Made
11In 2001, I was a gullible idiot.
12Reality Television Is The Final Sign Of The Apocalypse
13
Hitler's Seven Dwarfs
14That time a mad Russian was trying to impregante women with monkey babies.
15Handicapped People Are Getting Jerked Off In Japan
16
Well, well, well… Get a load of this piece of shit.
17Uncle Chaps Is Talking Shit Again
18I Spent WAY Too Long Listening To Billy Joel This Month
19"TROUBLE IN THE SEWAHS!"
20I HATE RATS
21
TRUE CRIME: History's Fattest Serial Killer Was From California
22
Twisted History Turns 100 And Is Now On Video
23
Kublai Khan Had 7,000 Concubines Vying For His Mongolian Beef

Karl Malone is no Arnold Schwarzenegger
25
Deontay Wilder Fucked Up My Trip To Saudi Arabia