Karl Malone is no Arnold Schwarzenegger
With Father's Day rapidly approaching, this week's Twisted History is all about bastards, and I highlight 2 celebrity bastard dads in particular.
QUICKLY- Arnold made lemonade with the child he had with his longtime housekeeper behind Maria Shriver's back...
… while it took the Mailman decades before he recognized the product of the statutory rape he committed when he was 20 years old.
(Fuck you.)
On top of that, I touch on some of history's most famous bastards, such as Alexander Hamilton, Confucius, and William I (AKA William The Bastard)… And then we touch on Mindy Kalling, Linda Evangelista, Oprah, Larry Bird, and a SHITLOAD of athletes who simply cannot stop having unprotected sex with women that aren't married to.
And, even though I don't think I am particularly handsome, Twisted History is now available as a video also… I attached it above.
Take a report.
-Large
Twisted History
25 videos
I Got My Ass Kicked By A Professional Sumo Wrestler
2Apparently, Frank The Tank Does More Than Just Walk
3How To Make An Irish Man Cream
4Are you like me?... Fat and/or drunk? Well, here's your drink for Thanksgiving!
5How To Make An Irish Cream
6"There were bodies in the trees!"
7The Deadliest Movie Never Made
8In 2001, I was a gullible idiot.
9Reality Television Is The Final Sign Of The Apocalypse
10Hitler's Seven Dwarfs
11That time a mad Russian was trying to impregante women with monkey babies.
12Handicapped People Are Getting Jerked Off In Japan
13Well, well, well… Get a load of this piece of shit.
14Uncle Chaps Is Talking Shit Again
15I Spent WAY Too Long Listening To Billy Joel This Month
16"TROUBLE IN THE SEWAHS!"
17I HATE RATS
18TRUE CRIME: History's Fattest Serial Killer Was From California
19Twisted History Turns 100 And Is Now On Video
20Kublai Khan Had 7,000 Concubines Vying For His Mongolian Beef
Karl Malone is no Arnold Schwarzenegger
22Deontay Wilder Fucked Up My Trip To Saudi Arabia
23Roberto Clemente Was An Outstanding Human Being
24Your Lips Have Gotta Touch The Toe
25Diamond Jim Brady Had A Stomach 6x The Size Of A Normal Man